yul brynner

HOLLYWOOD – It was revealed last night that the star of The King and I and The Magnificent Seven, Yul Brynner, is not – as has been widely reported  – dead.

Yul Bryner had allegedly died in 1985 of lung cancer, but sightings of him since have been sporadic, although those who have gone public with such claims have usually been dismissed as the kind of crackpots who believe Elvis is still alive or that Pink Floyd lyrics ‘mean something’. However, recently incontrovertible evidence in the form of a video has been obtained by the Studio Exec EXCLUSIVELY.

This video appears to show a solemn looking but very much alive Brynner dressed in his trademark cowboy garb with his signature bald head trying to kill a man with a mustache in some kind of western styled theme park. The video is incomplete and the audio isn’t very good but it is the first definite proof that Brynner is alive.

The Brynner estate have of course denied the authenticity of the video claiming that it is ‘a film which Yul made in 1973 called Westworld, long before his fatal illness. It’s a Michael Crichton piece and quite a good one at that.’

Others have pointed out that the the man who appears to be Yul Brynner is in fact a robot, built to resemble the Russian born film and stage actor.

However, such ludicrous answers only beg more questions. Why would anyone build a Yul Brynner robot? Was it Yul Brynner who died in New York or was it the robot Brynner? What does big tobacco have to say about this? And did anybody see Futureworld or did I dream that film?

If you have any answers to these questions or more questions please avail yourself of the comment box below to spew your nonsense.

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