werner herzog

LAS VEGAS – Famed Bavarian film director Werner Herzog popped in to the Studio Exec bungalow to give his take on the Donald Trump Hillary Clinton Presidential Debates.

Never in my life have I been witness to a scene of such obsidian darkness, primal savagery and moral corruption as that which I witnessed in Las Vegas on Wednseday evening, and remember, I worked closely with Klaus Kinski for many years, including the ones where he thought he was Jesus and wanted to wear my face skin as a cycling hat.

With the usual science fiction scenery, the flags of Star Fleet and two podiums like an interstellar quiz show, the scene was set. It is this way that US politics are decided, I understand. A lumbering seething manimal with orange hair had beeen poured into one of those rectangular metal suits, designed to disguise obesity and with slit-like eyes that did nothing to hide the alligator brain at work within, strobing over the audience, the moderator and his rival. The woman, who will most likely become the first female president of the United States, reminded me of Miss Marple from the Agatha Christie books, in the sense that wherever she goes murder is sure to follow. The man charged with keeping the bloodshed to a minimum and spittle off the screen was Chris Wallace, a ‘journalist’ from Fox News. The fact that anyone from this venal station in which door slamming is translated into English should be hired as a ‘moderator’ tells us exactly where we are in this genocidal country.

Language was torn from its roots and flung about with scant regard for sense or logic. The meaning of the words themselves ran in shame, out into the desert air of Nevada. There was talk of babies being ripped limb from limb and nuclear weapons being used on a whim, of countries being destroyed and made great again and people being shot in the streets for simply wanting to go to shops at the bottom of those streets. And yet none of the politicians suggested moving the shops to the top of the streets to reduce the risk! There was a ‘Nasty Woman’ and a ‘Puppet President’ and in the end everyone looked appalled at themselves and yet remarkably happy at the same time. I looked down at my hand and found I had accidentally driven a three inch nail into my palm so that the agony would distract me from the spectactle I was unfortunate enough to witness.

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