Monday 26 October 2020
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THE BLING RING: REVIEW – Hermione Granger (Emma Watson) has moved to LA and made a film with the best part of Godfather 3.

Based on ‘true’ events, the film starts with a kind of punkish promise, but it soon becomes drably repetitive pop art bullshit which seeks the nuanced profundity of Spring Breakers.
If you thought listening to people jaw away on cocaine, watching them dance in slow motion trances and take pictures of themselves with their phones is the best thing ever, then OMG you are going to die of excitement. Watch Mark and his spoilt rich brats break into the houses of spoilter richer brats! Laugh a the stupidity of Paris Hilton, not only because she’s stupid but she let them make the film in her house, even as they take the piss out of her.
The film is set up like a satire, but Sofia Coppola is so in love with her subject that she can only give it a mild ribbing, before making us feel they’re being punished harshly for their crimes. I was left wondering how they would have been dealt with if they’d been black teenagers breaking into Orlando Bloom’s house. Yeah, probably exactly the same.
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