GET BACK 2 – PLEASE F*CK OFF GREENLIT

HOLLYWOOD – After the runaway success of Peter Jackson’s Get Back Beatles documentary, Disney have announced a sequel entitled Get Back 2 – Please F*ck Off and has already started filming. This time around Get Back 2 – Please F*ck Off will be a docu-drama based on The Smith’s ex frontman and erotic fiction author, Morrissey. The film is being directed by Shane Meadows and stars Paddy Considine in the lead role. The Exec spoke with Meadows about his latest project.

Shane, Please Tell Us About Get Back 2 – Please F*ck Off

Peter (Jackson) called me up and said that Disney were driving truck after truck of money up his drive in an effort to get a sequel to Get Back. He didn’t want to helm it and thought my northern English roots made me the perfect choice to direct what is essentially a Morrissey biopic.

Has Morrissey Been Involved In This Project?

F*ck no! We wouldn’t let him anywhere near a Disney project. In fact we don’t even the rights to use any of his music, solo or with The Smiths. He refused. But to be honest, we kinds think that’s a good thing. Have you ever heard him? Jesus Christ, what a noise.

So You’re Not A Morrissey Fan?

Is anyone these days? Even if you were, you wouldn’t admit it. You’d be cancelled in seconds. But seriously, no I’m not. Just because I’m from that Manchester generation of creatives, doesn’t automatically make me a Morrissey disciple, all that warbling and jangling. Don’t hang the DJ, tell him to turn it up so we can’t hear any more from that insufferable bore.

How Close Have You Stuck To A True Story?

Oh, not all. We’ve really gone for ‘dramatic license’. Paddy is doing a marvelous job playing Morrissey as the tormented inventor of the British invasion to the States and Tom Hardy plays Johnny Marr like a cross between Keith Richards and George Best. It’s gonna be a real hatchet job. We’re gonna get sued by everyone, but thankfully it’s a Disney gig, so they can pay for lawyers.

Get Back 2 – Please F*ck Off Is Due For Release In Early 2022

TOM HARDY CAN HEAR WHAT GHOSTS ARE SAYING

HOLLYWOOD – Actor Tom Hardy can hear what ghosts are saying, but admits ‘it’s mostly shit’.

Venom and Capone actor Tom Hardy has the ability to hear ghosts speaking. The revelation came in an interview with French cultural magazine Chapeau. Speaking to Xavier Poulis, Hardy told the startled philosopher and pastry chef it was an ability he had had for years.

It started I guess when I was a kid, growing up. I’d be walking passed a cemetery and I’d be shouting, ‘Blimey, keep it down. Can’t hear myself think.’ But there would be no one there. Then my old gran told me that I had this ability. She said some people ‘shine‘. That was the word she used.

Wow!

I know. Sometimes I wonder if Stephen King ever met my Nan.

What do they say?

Mostly shit. Asking the time, talking about the weather, complaining about the bus service and how bad television is these days. Some of them are still on about Ben Affleck being such a bad choice for Batman.

Do they ever give you instructions?

Oh yeah. Lots of them want to update their Facebook status. Or ask me about the new James Bond, George Lazenby. I mean it depends. They all died at different points so there’s a muddle.

So this power you have, is there any way you can use it for good?

Nah. I mean I thought about it at first, but it’s just a pain in the balls really. A load of noise to tune out.

Tom Hardy is appearing in Lincoln on the Bardo.

BRIAN BLESSED TO DUB ALL TOM HARDY ROLES

HOLLYWOOD – Brian Blessed is to dub all Tom Hardy films from now on.

Mumbling heartthrob actor Tom Hardy is to be voiced by loud national treasure, Brian Blessed.

Veteran actor Blessed, made the announcement today by opening his bedroom window from his house at the peak of Kilimanjaro and shouted: ‘GOOD DAY EVERYBODY, DON’T BE ALARMED, IT IS JUST I, BRIAN BLESSED. GORDON’S ALIVE!’ bellowed the actor, shattering windows for hundreds of miles around.

‘I AM DELIGHTED TO ANNOUNCE I WILL BE THE VOICE YOU HEAR WHENEVER YOU WATCH A TOM HARDY FILM FROM NOW ON. NOBODY CAN UNDERSTAND A BLOODY WORD THE POOR LAD SAYS, SO THEY BROUGHT ME IN TO MAKE SURE WE CAN ALL UNDERSTAND HIM FROM NOW ON. GORDON’S ALIVE!’

‘I’M NOT DOING ANY BLOODY ACCENTS, MIND YOU. BECAUSE, WHEN YOU PAY FOR BRIAN, YOU GET BRIAN. FOR EXAMPLE, HERE IS ME IN TOM’S LAST FILM, CAPONE, AHEM,

“HELLO I AM AL CAPONE. OH NO, I JUST SHAT ME PANTS.” AND SCENE, GORDON’S ALIVE!’

‘HERE I AM BEING BOTH RON AND REGGIE KRAY IN LEGEND,

“HELLO REGGIE, I’M RONNIE” “NO, I’M RONNIE, YOU’RE REGGIE. “WHAT?” “EH?” “OH NO, WE BOTH JUST SHAT OUR PANTS!” AND SCENE, GORDON’S ALIVE!’

‘ANYWAY, YOU GET THE IDEA. YOU’RE GOING TO LOVE FINALLY BEING ABLE TO UNDERSTAND EVERY WORD THE POOR BOY SAYS. PEACE OUT. GORDON’S ALIVE!’

In support of this bold new move, Tom Hardy released the following statement:

‘Mumble mumble. Murmur murmur. Mumble. Murmur. Mumble murmur.’

Tom Hardy’s next film will be a remake of The Horse Whisperer, directed by Michael Bay.

CHRISTOPHER NOLAN RECALLS BACK CATALOGUE FOR TENET

HOLLYWOOD – Christopher Nolan recalls his entire catalogue of films prior to the release of Tenet.

In a bold marketing move to promote Tenet, Christopher Nolan has recalled his back catalogue. He’s demanded the public ‘Get back to their iMax cinemas and watch my new film’.

The blockbuster auteur famous for complex plots and breathtaking action blockbusters such as Interstellar and The Dark Knight Trilogy released this statement:

‘I decree all my other films will not be seen again until you all get your sh*t together and cough up the price of an iMax ticket. They will be wiped from all streaming sites. If you have them on archaic ‘Blu Rays’ or even ‘DVDs’ (hahahahahahahaha), expect a visit. Someone in a smart Italian suit with slicked back hair will knock on your door. They will resemble either Tom Hardy or Marillon Cotillard. They will point a gun in your face until you hand my films over. Some of you may dream about an idea to wipe all of my films from your hard drives. You will follow up on this dream and obey.’

‘The Academy aren’t getting away with this either.’ said Nolan, ‘Those gutless wonders aren’t pulling out of next year’s Oscars. I’ll win Best Picture if I have to brain wash incept every single one of them. I refuse to accept Trolls World Tour will win the Best Picture Oscar by bloody default.’

Warner Brothers release Tenet on July 17th later this year. I will now delete all of my Batman films, for some reason. I obey, I obey.

TOM HARDY TO STAR AS BLAKE IN BLAKE’S 7 MOVIE

LONDON – Tom Hardy to play Blake in film version of cult UK TV show Blake’s 7.

Fans of BBC cult show Blake’s 7 were celebrating today, when Tom Hardy announced that he would star as Blake in Blake’s 7.  He spoke EXCLUSIVELY with The Studio Exec about his long-cherished project to star in the remake of the cult sci-fi show:

I am very excited. I was a bit young to catch Blake’s 7 when it was first on, but I watched my dad’s video cassette’s of the show and fell in love. I just liked the imagination that went into it. There’s always this sense of low budget fun and wit as well.

 

It is unclear if Benedict Cumberbatch is still to direct the film.

Originally, he was going to play Avon. Paul Bettany is on board to play Villa and Cate Blanchet will play the arch-villainess Servalan. But then he’s also looking to move in to directing so I don’t know if this will be the one or not. He’s a great pal and I’d love to work with him.

According to rumors, the plot will involve Blake escaping from a prison ship with a band of other outlaws and fighting against a totalitarian force. All goes well until they land on the planet North Wales, which looks exactly like an old quarry in North Wales.

I like the idea of going to North Wales to film the planet North Wales, but apparently we’re going to use Greenland instead because that’s what everyone does now.

Blake’s 7 will be released in 2022.

TOM HARDY TO PLAY THE FONZ IN HAPPY DAYS SPIN OFF

HOLLYWOOD – Venom and Mad Max star Tom Hardy to Arthur ‘the Fonz’ Fonzarelli in a new Happy Days spin off movie.

fonz

‘Sit on it!’ Tom Hardy says as he comes in the room. He’s preparing for the role of a life time, Arthur the Fonz Fonzarelli. Living upstairs with the Cunninghams, Fonz returns in a new big screen outing and Hardy can’t wait.

I loved Happy Days when I was a kid. Monday – Tuesday – Happy Days! Wednesday – Thursday Happy Days! – the week is through there’s nothing to do rocking all night with youuuuuuuuuu!

Yeah, that’s gr…

These are the days ahhh ahhh ah!

Okay right! Enough! So Ron Howard is directing?

Yeah, having Richie Cunningham is going to be really special. We really want to have the old flavor of the original. That’s why the original Fonz Henry Winkler will be returning as my dad. And other cast members are coming back.

Like Scott Baio.

With Scott, it’s complicated. We have to see if Olive Garden will give him the time off.

The Fonz is Back will be released in 2019.

BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH TO DIRECT TOM HARDY IN BLAKE’S 7 MOVIE

HOLLYWOOD – Benedict Cumberbatch is to make his directorial debut with a big screen adaptation of BBC cult sci-fi show Blake’s 7.

Fans of BBC cult show Blake’s 7 were celebrating today, when Benedict Cumberbatch announced that he would be directing a movie of the 80s science fiction series. He spoke EXCLUSIVELY with The Studio Exec about his long-cherished project:

Of course I was a bit young for Blake’s 7 when it was first shown (1978-1981), but my uncle had them all on video cassette because he worked for the BBC and I got hooked. For me it was a little bit more sci-fi than Doctor Who, which I also loved. Blake’s 7 was just something else though.

Cumberbatch won’t be playing Blake though.

No I’ve got Tom Hardy for that role. He’s so charismatic. I’m not sure if people would believe me as that sort of leader.

But he will be acting as Ker Avon, an ambiguous member of the seven.

It is a role I’ve been dying to play my whole life. Of course, it’ll be hard to live up to Paul Darrow’s masterful performance. Paul Bettany is on board to play Villa and Cate Blanchet will play the arch-villainess Servalan.

Blake’s 7 will be released in 2019.

REVIEW – DUNKIRK

REVIEW – DUNKIRK – Christopher Nolan returns with a superb and unconventional war film about the BFG trying to save the British Army after they decided to Brexit.

Young British soldier Tommy (Fionn Whitehead) needs two things. One: to get out of Northern France and get home. And two, to have a shit.

Nolan’s movie never fully decides whether he achieves both. But it is testament to his brilliance that the whole film concerns itself with the nitty-gritty of survival alongside the historical import of it.

Along with 400,000 of his comrades in arms, Tommy is trapped on the beach with the Germans only miles away. At the same time, their planes strafing the lines of waiting soldiers. The Navy can’t get in to pick them up because of the shallow draught and the airforce is apparently reluctant to risk their planes when an invasion of Britain looks iminent. But Tommy still needs to get out.

Meanwhile, Mark Rylance – surely everyone’s ideal 1940s granddad – sets off in a small boat to help in the rescue operation. And above in the sky three spitfires seem to be all the RAF will allow. Luckily, Tom Hardy pilots one of them and there has been very little as satisfying in modern cinema as seeing Tom Hardy handle a spitfire.

With these ingredients – earth, sea, air – and an Inception like time structure – a week, a day, an hour – Nolan constructs one of those most original war films in years. There’s an immediate urgency and a latent panic all the way through, aided by one of Hans Zimmer’s most impressive scores. Nolan manages to places us in the middle of the action without ever glorying in the war porn. In fact, the most touching death occurs as a banal accident. And the terror of death comes as much from water as from bullets and bombs.

The performances are wonderful as well with Kenneth Branagh scanning the horizon with such Britishness that he might as well be suet pudding in a woolly sock. And then there’s what Nolan doesn’t show. The Germans. The homefront. Wives and sweethearts. Anxious mothers. Churchill.  Generals in front of a big map.

The film’s concerns reflect those of the characters. The logistics, the numbers. For the pilots, the fuel they need to get home. Britain likes heroic failures. It’s why it glories in Scott of the Antarctic – who lost the race to the pole. And Mallory and Irvine – who died on Everest. It’s why Admiral Nelson – who died at the Battle of Trafalgar – gets a column in the middle of London, while Wellington – who won but survived at Waterloo – only gets a boot. Dunkirk was a defeat and Nolan’s characters see it as such. But his film earns its patriotic zeal and it’ll be a hard hearted Nazi who can watch the final reel without a tear breaching their defences.

For more Reviews, Click Here.

DANIEL CRAIG’S LAST BOND FILM GETS TITLE

HOLLYWOOD – Daniel Craig will appear in his last appearance as James Bond, 007 in Never Say Never Again Again.

So Idris Elba, Tom Hardy and Tom Hiddleston will have to cool their heels a little longer. Daniel Craig has confirmed he will be donning the tuxedo one more time. He came to the Studio Exec bungalow to talk about it.

So here we are again. How’s it going?

Fine, Dan, fine. Tell me about the new Bond film.

We have a title. As you know we’ve run out of books, so we’re going back to remake Thunderball again. We’re calling it Never Say Never Again Again, because that sounds like the situation I’m in.

Why do another one? You obviously didn’t enjoy Spectre.

Fair question. Yeah, I was a bit grumpy about Spectre, because it is very physically demanding. Also the film itself turned out to be quite dour. This one we’re going for a whole new effect. I want it to be as funny as the Roger Moore films and as well put together as On Her Majesty’s Secret Service. Sam Mendes doesn’t want to direct anymore, so we’re currently searching for a director. I like Jim Jarmusch, or failing that David Lynch.

That would be a change.

Yeah I know. Ultimately, Bond needs to change if he’s going to survive. Fior instance, I also want the film to recognise that I’m older now. So I’m going to be doing a lot of sitting in comfy chairs and instead of foot chases, we’re going to have a chase on segues.

What about Christopher Nolan as a director?

I don’t know. He feels a bit young and untested.

Never Say Never Again Again will be released in 2020.

NO ONE DIRECTION SONGS IN DUNKIRK TRAILER

HOLLYWOOD – The first trailer for Christopher Nolan’s Dunkirk dropped, disappointing many One Direction fans.

The trailer for Christopher Nolan’s first foray into comedy Dunkirk hit the internet today. However, One Direction fans felt a little disappointed that the soundtrack didn’t give a taste of any new One Direction material. Christopher Nolan told the Studio Exec EXCLUSIVELY that fans shouldn’t panic:

Look, we haven’t put any songs in the trailer. Neither have we given the whole story away in the trailer either, or all the lines. We want to hold something back. And the One Direction songs, which will include a cover of Rio by Duran Duran, exist as an integral part of the story.

However, One Directioners everywhere, or 1Ders, or 1 D1rect1oners or… well them, fumed across internet message boards. Joey1dLover wrote:

This is bullsh1t!

Another one – Another1Done – wrote:

Shitty bull balls and horse’s piss flaps. Who are all these soldiers and why did Harry have to cut his ha1r?

The film set for a summer release tells the story of the retreat and evacuation of the British army from the beaches of France in 1940. It stars Tom Hardy, Kenneth Branagh, Cillian Murphy, Harry Styles, Louis Tomlinson, Naill Horan, Liam Payne and Mark Rylance. Though rumors of an appearance by Zayn Malik remain unconfirmed.

Dunkirk will be released in 2017.

FIRST LOOK AT TOM HARDY AS ELTON JOHN

HOLLYWOOD – The first image of Tom Hardy as Elton John has been revealed from the new biopic of the singer’s life, Rocket Man.

The image (above) shows Tom Hardy performing as Elton John and looking uncannily similar to the singer, identical almost. Sources close to the production told Studio Exec EXCLUSIVELY that the Mad Max: Fury Road star performs the songs in the film. Apparently, Hardy has ‘an exceptionally good voice’.

Tom does a version of ‘Goodbye, Yellow Brick Road’ which is utterly amazing. I would say it even surpasses Sir Elton’s performance. Tom is such a professional and he’s very committed to the role. He shaved his head and walks around wearing Elton’s glasses and wearing his clothes and just becoming him. Then the other day he was on a tennis court and someone tried to take a picture of him. Tom went ballistic just the way Elton would have done. Beautiful.

Fans have reacted with a shocked silence, not a single one saying a word. Except for some who have claimed that the picture is some kind of forgery.

Written by Billy Elliot screenwriter Lee Hall and directed by Michael Gracey, the film chronicles the singer’s battle with addiction and his early rise to fame.

Rocket Man will be released in 2018.

FIRST IMAGE FROM MAD MAX: SCHOOL RUN HIT THE NET

HOLLYWOOD – The first image from Mad Max: School Run, the sequel to Mad Max: Fury Road, has hit the internet and caused intense excitement.

George Miller today released the first image taken from Mad Max sequel, Mad Max: School Run. He told the Studio Exec EXCLUSIVELY:

We’re all made up over here mate. After we had such a big success with Fury Road, the question was always, how am I gonna top that? But we got our heads together and we really had a good old think. Then we realized: Let’s get rid of all the usual shit, the post-apocalypse, the punk, the wasteland and let’s see how these same characters would fare in an ordinary suburban American situation.

Can you tell us anything about the story?

Furiosa and Max have had some kids and they’ve settled down. Plus the apocalypse has been solved. Everyone has just got together adn agreed to be nice again. So we’re ten years on from the original film, society is back to normal and the couple have a bevvy of little sprogs. But getting them to school on time and then Max has to go to his job at the DMC and Furiosa needs to be at the Pentagon and so it works out very complicated. It doesn’t help that Immortan Josephine is the school monitor and wants to catch them speeding or in some other school yard violation as revenge for their killing of her brother Immortan Joe.

Sounds great!

It’s gonna be a flipping classic mate. Just you wait and see.

What’s next?

I want to go back to the Babe universe and close the trilogy.

Is this the infamous Babe in Space?

Damn right. We had to wait for a porn film of the same name to settle for the copyright, but it’s gonna be fantastic.

Mad Max: School Run will open in 2018.

Image courtesy of the amazing @ThePixelFactor.

5 FACTS YOU NEVER KNEW ABOUT CHRISOPHER NOLAN’S DUNKIRK

LONDON – The Inception and Dark Knight trilogy director Christopher Nolan’s new film Dunkirk has begun filming but what do we actually know about the Second World War epic?

We sent the Studio Exec FACT Squad to the beaches of Northern France and then had to rescue them in a fleet of small fishing vessels.

1. Dunkirk will be Christopher Nolan’s first period film – except for The Prestige – and his first film to have a one word title – except for Inception and Interstellar and Insomnia and Memento – Okay it’s the fifth film to have a one word title, but it doesn’t begin with ‘In’, so that’s something. 

2. The cast of Dunkirk features a slew of Christopher Nolan regulars such as Cillian Murphy and Tom Hardy. The most eye-catching casting decision comes in the form of One Direction singer Harry Styles who will also perform a number of anachronistic pop songs, including a cover of Britney Spears’ Hit Me Baby (One More Time), which according to the shooting script is played over an aerial bombardment of London.

3. The historical events which serve as the inspiration for the film involved an operation to rescue the retreating remnants of the British Expeditionary Force. Nolan has gone on record as saying he is aiming for maximum authenticity and ‘except for the Batman cameo, that’s exactly what you’ll see.’

4. Christopher Nolan continues his commitment to film as opposed to digital and will shoot the film in 70mm making it the smallest film ever made.

5. Music for the film will once more be provided by Hans Zimmer who has already started preparing the score. He told the Exec: ‘We want a period feel but we also want to attract a younger audience to the movie, especially with Harry Styles involved, so we’re going to have this old Vera Lynne, Glenn Miller orchestra playing popular songs by One Direction, Rihanna and Justin Timberlake.

For more FACTS on everything from this to that click HERE! 

TOM HARDY’S NEW TV SHOW TABOO BASED ON CARD GAME

HOLLYWOOD – The new Tom Hardy TV show Taboo is loosely inspired by the parlor game Taboo, which people play at parties that everyone wants to leave.

Tom Hardy Spoke to The Studio Exec today about his new TV show Taboo which he says is loosely inspired by the game Taboo.

Me and my old dad were sitting round one day wondering what we could do with a TV show. Steven Knight was there as well. And we got bored so we started paying a game of Taboo. We were having ourselves a right old laugh when my old fellow said, ‘Here’s an idea Thomas! Why don’t you do a TV show about this?’ What, a card game? And he said yes. I went to the khasi and when I came back Steven had treatment ready for me. One Skype call later and we had the BBC on board.

That’s amazing. So the show will be about a bunch of people guessing a word but not able to use obvious clues that are proscribed by the card?

That was the initial idea yes. But the BBC, being the BBC, had some notes.

I see. What like?

Well, they said instead of it being me, Steven and my dad playing this guessing game, it should be me coming back from Africa to take over my father’s shipping Empire.

Taboo will be broadcast on the BBC sometime this year.