GWYNETH PALTROW TO STAR IN SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION REMAKE

HOLLYWOOD – Stephen King announced that Gwyneth Paltrow will star in the remake of his classic film The Shawshank Redeption due to start filming this May.

Gwyneth Paltrow is to star in a remake of the Shawshank Redemption. The Shakespeare in Love star will play Andrea Dufresne, an accountant unjustly accused of the murder of her husband. Sent to serve a life sentence at the Shawshank Women’s Prison, she must learn to live in the prison while staying true to herself.

Stephen King will direct the new version. He wrote the original short story ‘Rita Hayworth and the Shawshank Redemption’.

He spoke EXCLUSIVELY with the Studio Exec about the new film:

I loved the original film that Frank Darabont directed, but as with The Shining and Stanley Kubrick I always felt that it wasn’t quite what I had in mind. The idea of changing the protagonist to a woman and updating it came to me while I was watching Orange is the New Black. First, I called Gwyneth’s people and they gave me her number. She loved it. We met and that was that.

Gwyneth Paltrow said it was thrilling to do something that wasn’t a vegan cook book.

I’m a huge fan of Tim Robbins and of the original film. But what really appeals to me about the script is that I don’t get my head chopped off. That’s actually all I care about.

Leslie Jones will play Red.

The Shawkshank Redemption will be released in 2018.

FX TO MAKE HUDSUCKER PROXY TV SHOW

HOLLYWOOD – Following the success of the Fargo TV show, FX have announced they have green lit a spin off TV version of the hit Coen Brothers movie: The Hudsucker Proxy.

Based on the 1994 film starring Tim Robbins, Jennifer Jason Leigh and Paul Newman, The Hudsucker Proxy TV show will be written by Noah Hawley and executive produced by the Coen Brothers. Hawley came by the Studio Exec Bungalow to talk about the project:

I’m really excited. We’ve done two seasons of Fargo and the third will be a real challenge but now I have enough people in place that I can kind of let it run itself and I am ready for a new challenge. Hudsucker is going to give me that.

How is it going to be different from Fargo?

Well, if you’ve seen the film you’ll know that it is a tribute to the sort of screwball comedies of the 30s and 40s and much less dark than Fargo. So we’re going to be doing that. There will be much less violence. Bruce Campbell also had a great role in the film so we’re hoping he’ll come back for us.

So there’ll be less violence?

Oh absolutely. The whole tone will be lighter and more comic. Plus we’re looking at a totally different demographic. A younger audience. This is going to be fun and youthful, colorful and with lots of music and dance. Oh and they’re going to be the Muppets as well. They are going to be working in Hudsucker Industries int he lower sections.

That sounds… very different. So it’s going to be …

You know for kids.

The Hudsucker Proxy: The Show will be broadcast in 2016.

ELI ROTH: GREEN INFERNO FIRST OF THREE COLORS TRILOGY

HOLLYWOOD – Horror maestro and Mr. Eyebrows 1997, Eli Roth today announced that Green Inferno was but the first in a ‘Three Colors Trilogy’, in imitation of Krzysztof Kieslowski’s famous Three Colors Trilogy.

Eli Roth, director of Hostel and Cabin Fever, revealed today that his latest film – The Green Inferno – is just part one of a projected Three Colors Trilogy. Slipping into the Studio Exec Bungalow ealry this morning, he sat in the dark watching us sleep before announcing his presence.

The first film is of course The Green Inferno, partly because of the green of the rainforest and also because of the ecology, the politics of the young people who go there and find themselves embroiled in a terrible fight for survival as they are beset by cannibals. The second film in the trilogy is going to be The Blue Inferno. Here, we have some oceanographers who are researching the famous plastic bottle island. Again there is a sense of environmental responsibility but now it is a group of mutants who attack them and rend their flesh. The twist here is that the mutants were originally extras working on Kevin Reynolds Waterworld, starring Kevin Costner, who were left behind when the movie wrapped and went feral.

What about the third film?

The third film is going to be called The Red Inferno.

Ah! Because of blood?

No, because it is going to be set on Mars. A group of ecologists are taking it to the next level. They are worried about not only saving the planet but saving all planets. Worried abvout a spike in temperatures on the planet Mars they travel there in an attempt to draw attention to global warming on Mars. But unfortunately they are captured by Tim Robbins and Gary Sinise who are still there following Brian dePalma’s tragic Mission to Mars.

Jesus!

I know.

And how does this tie in to Kieslowski’s Three Colors Trilogy?

Kieslowski has been an influence on my whole career. Look at Hostel: Part 2 and you’ll see it’s basically a remake of A Short Film About Killing. I always wanted to match the maestro’s breadth, but until now I was unable to find the subject matter that would suit such scope, but now with Green Inferno, Blue Inferno and Red Inferno, I think I’ve got it.

The Green Inferno is on general release.

47 FILMS: 5. THE PLAYER

More 47 Films to see before you’re murdered in your dreams. This episode we tackle Robert Altman’s slap in the face to Hollywood, The Player.

I liked Bob Altman he was a mean old bastard but he made Popeye: The Musical which should be shown in every film school as a lesson as to why excessive amounts of cocaine and a large production budget is a dangerous combination.

Altman was on coke, Robin Williams was on coke and my old tennis partner Robert Evans got arrested for smuggling pounds of coke onto the set. Hell they even hired Harry Nielson to do the soundtrack which on a drug-riddled film set in 1980 was the equivalent of employing Count Dracula to run a blood bank. After the cast and crew had sniffed everything that wasn’t nailed down, they’d managed to cobble together something that only just resembles a film. Popeye was critically mauled, Altman was blamed for losing control and he spent the rest of the 80s in limbo making patchy work with few highlights and plenty of stinkers.

Then in 1992 he pops up from nowhere with The Player, a savagely satirical character assassination of Hollywood and the scoundrels, chancers and lowlifes that work in the movie industry. Altman sticks the knife into the back of the major studios and everyone who has pissed him off during his film making career and then spins them around and sticks a knife in their front. From the vapid, morally bankrupt executives to the screenwriters willing to compromise their integrity for a deal, Altman exposes the business side of the show where the rules of normal society don’t apply, the dollar rules and if you have enough cash and enough power you can get away with anything, even murder.

The real beauty of The Player though is Altman’s dismantling of the tricks and conventions of film making, whilst he’s making a film. You never know if a certain shot is a parody or if all of the 80 or so cameos from actors playing themselves are in on the joke. Christ knows how he got so many major stars to climb aboard in the first place but it seems they were all sold on the idea of biting the hand that feeds them, even just for a few seconds. Critics of the picture will say that it’s Altman’s own bitter and cynical perspective of the business but if he could get so much talent on board to knowingly send themselves up, it’s either a mass delusion or it cuts very close to the bone.

If you’re doing film studies you should already have seen it and if you haven’t then your lecturer should be fired. As for the rest of us citizens there is plenty to admire and enjoy on the surface but if you’ve got a bit of film knowledge and you’re willing to dig a little deeper, the rewards just keep on coming.

For more of our 47 Films to see before you’re murdered in your dreams Click Here

MY FAVORITE FILM: SEAN PENN

HOLLYWOOD – Favorite films gives film makers, actors and famous people the chance to talk about the films that have inspired them to be who they are, do what they do, or simply enjoy an evening out when they’re trying not to go out. This week: Sean Penn.

What’s my favorite film? What a stupid f*cking question. That’s like asking me if I prefer scrambled eggs or poached eggs. I don’t even f*cking like eggs. Wait a minute. I do, I like fried eggs but not on toast they have to be on their own. No salt. 
Tim Robbins, the prick, he likes boiled eggs which just goes to show what kind of man he is. I could have had his role in The Shawshank Redemption. They asked me first but I told them to go f*ck themselves. I wanted him to get struck by lightning as soon as he escaped. That would have been more realistic. He spends twenty years trying to get out and as soon as he does, boom, he gets zapped and the message would have been hope is futile because sh*t happens. I like that. It’s gritty.
 
I’d have gone that way with Batman too. His parents get whacked, all very f*cking tragic and he spends all this time learning to fight crime and making his suit and whatever and the first day he goes out on the job he gets shot in the head. Bang! He’s a vegetable. Spends the rest of his days drooling in his wheelchair and eating baby food through a straw. Alfred puts his head in the oven because the stress of being a full time carer gets too much for him to cope with. That’s art, baby. That’s social f*cking commentary.
 
I used to love De Niro. Taxi Driver, Deer Hunter. Films about men doing manly things. You can smell the f*cking testosterone, but he’s a joke now. A joke without a f*cking punchline. I was on a plane and I caught the Big Wedding. It made me want to vomit so I got the pilot to divert the plane to New York, got off, took a taxi to De Niro’s, knocked on his door and when he answered it, I punched him in the head. I left but then I remembered Righteous Kill so I went back and punched him in the head again. Now I can’t go within 500 yards of the prick. F*ck him. Anyway what was the question, what is my favorite egg?.What a stupid f*cking question. Go f*ck yourself.
 

Sean Penn will star in The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty due for release on Dec 26 2013.

SCRIPT LEAK:THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION 2

Ext: Saywatanyo beach.

ANDY DUFRESNE HAS AGED 30 YEARS AND IS NOW BALDING WITH A LONG WHITE BEARD. HE’S STILL SANDING THE SAME BOAT HE WAS WORKING ON AT THE END OF THE SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION.

                 Andy
You were right Red. All it takes is patience and time.

ANDY PUTS DOWN THE SAND PAPER

                 Andy
     There. Finished. What do you think?

THE CAMERA PANS TO A SKELETON HALF BURIED IN THE SAND HOLDING A SUITCASE AND WEARING RED’S SHIRT AND TIE.

                 Andy
Oh F*ck. And to think I was going to ask him to marry me.

ANDY PRODUCES A REVOLVER FROM HIS POCKET, PUTS IT IN HIS MOUTH AND PULLS THE TRIGGER.


SEAN PENN ENDORSES MITT ROMNEY

WASHINGTON – In a shock turnaround, Sean Penn has publicly endorsed Mitt Romney for President at a rally in Tampa earlier today.

The My Name is Sam star and famed radical activist and campaigner explained his change of heart to a packed crowd at a Mitt is It rally. ‘I realised how much I earn,’ Penn blustered. ‘So fuck yeah, he’s got my vote.’

Penn joins a whole barrage of erstwhile liberals in lining up behind the Mittster who has promised cut taxes and allow poor people to be legally hunted as game.

Michael Moore said earlier this week that being right wing and crazy ‘was just more funny’. And Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon said they believed that many stars were attracted to Romney’s lack of charisma.

‘You hang around show people all the time with their humor and excitement and sparkling conversation and it’s tiring,’ the Rocky Horror Picture Show strumpet remarked. ‘With Mr. Romney you’re safe from any danger of being remotely interested in anything he has to say.’

Some have linked Penn’s change of heart to the fact that although he was definitely gay in Milk, he appears to be married in This is not the Place. Whilst many see this as further evidence that Mitt Romney is in fact a character created by Sacha Baron Cohen for a new comedy film.