AMY ADAMS’ TOP 5 POP TARTS

HOLLYWOOD – Amy Adams – the versatile Hollywood actress of The Master, Man of Steel, American Hustle and Arrival – came into the Studio Exec office to give us her top 5 Pop Tarts.

1. S’Mores: Amy Adams. ‘Sticky marshmallow and melted chocolate in one scrumptious pastry pocket, this is a traditional favorite in the the Adam’s household. Paul Thomas Anderson hates them.’

2. Frosted Strawberry. Amy Adams. ‘When we were making The Fighter, Christian Bale had lost a lot of weight for the role so I used to taunt him with Frosted Strawberry pop tarts. But the joke was on me. When we were doing American Hustle, Christian would gorge on them and I had to watch my figure, ha ha!’

3. Frosted Rainbow Cookie Sandwich. Amy Adams. ‘When people ask me what’s Jason Segel like in real life I always tell them he’s like a Frosted Rainbow Cookie Sandwich Pop Tart. It’s easier than telling the truth.’

 4. Cinnamon Roll. Amy Adams. ‘People wonder whether Trouble With the Curve was a misstep in my career, but I think when you get the chance of working with a genuine Hollywood legend like Clint you grab it with both hands.’

 5. Chocolate Chip. Amy Adams. ‘You know actually I don’t really eat Pop Tarts that much. I’m just copying these names of Wikipedia. Who knew they had a page devoted to Pop Tart flavors? It’s just I heard Jessica Chastain was doing a Hot Pockets top five for The Hollywood Reporter and anything that bitch can do, I can do a thousand times better.’

For more of Amy Adams’ Top 5 Advice Click Here.

AMY ADAMS’ TOP 5 EXTERNAL HARD DRIVES

HOLLYWOOD – Amy Adams – the versatile Hollywood actress of The Master, Man of Steel and American Hustle – came into the Studio Exec office to give us her top 5 external hard drives of 2016.

So Amy Adams! Hard Drives. Go!

1. The Buffalo Drive Station DDR: Amy Adams: “At 3 TB this drive has roomy capacity. Perfect for back up but also for storing all those whopping media files you might have illegally downloaded, you darn critters. It’s fast and super efficient. Though it can be a bit pricey, so you might want to ask yourself do I need all that space?” 

2. IoSafe Solo G3: Amy Adams: “Also providing 3 TB, the IoSafe is principally for back up. It’s a safe as houses Hard Drive with no frills.”  

3. LaCie 5Big Thunderbolt: Amy Adams: “Whereas the previous two gave you 3 TBs a piece, the Thunderbolt gives you a ginormous 20 TB, which basically means you can back up your own brain if you want to. However, be warned the price tag is as hefty as the memory capacity.” 

4. Toshiba Canvio: Amy Adams: “At the lower end of the market and very good value, we have the Toshiba. It only provides 1TB, but for most of us that is more than enough. Perfect for your personal computing needs, photos, media files etc.”

5. WD My Passport Ultra: Amy Adams: “This is the compromise buy. Those who want a little extra room but don’t want to pay the Ka-Boom!  I know for a fact this is what Paul Thomas Anderson uses to name but one of the many directors I’ve worked with.”

For more of Amy Adams’ Top 5 advice Click Here

PAUL THOMAS ANDERSON AND PAUL W.S. ANDERSON ARE THE EXACT SAME PERSON

HOLLYWOOD – It was revealed yesterday, and much to the consternation of Milla Jovovich, that Paul W.S. Anderson, the artistic genius behind Resident Evil, The Three Musketeers and Alien Vs Predator is in fact that same person as the trashy commercial director Paul Thomas Anderson, whose crowd pleasing The Master recently gave the plebs their jollies at various low brow festival such as Venice and Toronto.

Rumours have been rife for years and no one had ever seen the two director in ‘the same room together at the same time’. And Oliver Stone – among others – had pointed out the possible connection between the Andersons/Anderson dilemma and the faking of the moon landing and various theories surrounding the 9/11 attacks.

Anderson himself who will now be known as Paul Thomas W.S. Anderson expressed relief that ‘the lying is over’.

‘I originally got the idea from Stephen King when he wrote the Bachman books,’ Anderson said. ‘After Event Horizon got such a panning I wondered if I’d ever work again and so I invented this whole other identity, but really it was just a couple of middle initials. I thought everyone already knew.’

ALIEN VS PREDATOR VS PROMETHEUS IS GO

HOLLYWOOD – Paul W.S. Anderson (who recently was revealed to be the same person as Paul Thomas Anderson, CLICK HERE) has confirmed that his next film will be Alien Vs. Predator Vs. Prometheus:

Speaking with the Studio Exec, Anderson said the follow up to Prometheus will be ‘like one big xenomorph tag team.’

Anderson is obviously enthused at the prospect of AVP(VP) and says the script is already finished and filming is ready to begin. 

I basically knocked it out in an afternoon. Funny thing is I rang Damon Lindeloff to boast and he told me Prometheus has taken less time to write than it took to watch. Like I’m sitting at the feet of the master. Hey, Master, The Master, get it?


The film will take place in the same universe as the Alien and Predator franchises and will also involve ‘Engineers’ and a really stupid bunch of humans.

That was the brilliance of Prometheus. Usually if you’re writing characters who I supposed to be really brainy it’s really difficult, but Damon made the scientists dumb asses, that was almost like the “autobiographical” element.

Alien Vs. Predator Vs. Prometheus will be released in October 2016 and will star various wives.

AMY ADAMS’ TOP 5 CHEESES

HOLLYWOOD –  Oscar nominated and multi-talented actress, star of The Master, American Hustle and The Muppets, Amy Adams is also the Studio Exec resident Consumer Advice Expert. Today she’s tasting cheeses.

1. Edam – This Dutch cheese – originating from the town of the same name in the Netherlands –  is a mild cheese, with hardly any flavor and no smell. This is the cheese for people who don’t like cheese. Slightly salty and softer than some other mild cheeses such as cheddar. This is a very good entry level cheese, but cheese aficionados will find it somewhat insipid.

2. Brie – This beautiful French cow’s cheese with a soft white rind of mold is delicious eaten with a traditional crunchy baguette, but be warned there are a range of varieties and tastes and quality vary.  

3. Gorgonzola – Blue cheese is one of the things which most disconcerts David O. Russell, the director of The Fighter and American Hustle. But few know that I was actually born in Italy and this delicious Italian cheese is gorgeous with pears, celery or melted on bread or pasta.

4. Cheddar – The original Cheddar comes from a small town in Somerset, England. Christian Bale first brought me some of this cheese. He is a cheese maniac and can get quite angry. Many is the time he has interrupted filming with a strangled cry of ‘Who Touched my CHEESE?’ Perfect for ‘cheese on toast’.

5. Stinking Bishop -A relatively new cheese, first created in 1972, soaked in Perry with a high fat content. But be warned the smell is quite pungent and will put off many, but the taste is delicious. Incidentally, Robert de Niro eats nothing but Stinking Bishop.

For more of Amy Adams’ Top Five advice Click Here.  

ARGO IS THE IMDB NUMBER 1 GREATEST FILM OF ALL TIME











LONDON – After last night’s double BAFTA win Ben Affleck’s passport caper Argo shot to the top of the IMDB rankings kicking The Shawshank Redemption from the number one spot.


Warner Brothers spokesman Chester Field told us that whilst everyone involved in the production is pleased with the accolades, the picture’s astounding success still hasn’t quite sunk in.

“Everyone is a little bit in shock if we’re honest,” said a shocked looking Field.

“When Ben showed us the film for the first time we thought. Yeah, this is all right. It’s a good old yarn and I’m sure we’ll make our money back but we never imagined it would be so popular.”

Executive producer George Clooney also declared he was mystified by Argo’s accolades.

“Hell, if I thought it would be up for any awards I would have directed it myself! That’s not saying Ben didn’t do a fine job but it’s not exactly The Master is it?


However Professor Hans Muller, a film history and philosophy lecturer at Harvard University claims he can explain why Argo is sweeping the boards.
“Beards” said a confident Foxton. “For decades the beard was out of fashion because women began dominating the fashion magazines and the pop videos and turning men into hairless girly boys they could boss around. The beard went from being a sign of masculinity to being a sign of laziness and psychosis. Now men are simply throwing off the shackles of three decades of female oppression and shouting to the world I AM A MAN. I HAVE A BEARD!”
However director Danny Boyle thinks there is a more simple explanation for Argo’s success.

“Well it’s all just bollocks isn’t it. You can’t take any of it seriously and anyone who does needs a kick in the bollocks”