CRONENBERG V CRONENBERG DEATHMATCH ON HBO MAX

MOVIE NEWS – A live televised Cronenberg V Cronenberg Deathmatch will air on HBO Max this coming Fall. The father and son directors get all Oedipal as they decide once and for all which one wears the crown. The Cronenberg V Cronenberg Deathmatch will stream live on HBO Max in the USA. Amazon Prime will live stream the fight in all other territories.

Cronenberg V Cronenberg Deathmatch : The Background

Senior Cronenberg David, had moved away from his staple diet of body horror based movies in recent years. The Canadian auteur had recently made a slew of critically acclaimed films dealing with hard hitting topics outside of the horror genre. With films such as A History Of Violence, Eastern Promises and A Dangerous Method, he explored the darker side of human nature while staying away from his horror roots. He also explored Viggo Mortensen with his old fella out a fair amount.

Long Live The New Flesh

But that all changed when David’s son, Brandon scored a critical success with his film Viral. The film dealt with issues such as celebrity culture and corporate conspiracies. It used the old family tradition of body horror to do so with great effect. Suddenly David was not the only celebrated film maker at the Cronenberg table. It wasn’t just him boring everyone shitless at Christmas about ‘body horror this’ or ‘existential paranoia that’. There was a new voice at the other end of the table, beyond the cranberry sauce and Brussel sprouts. A younger voice saying ‘celebrity virus this’, and ‘intrusive technology’ that. The times were indeed a changin’.

I’m Getting Better

David took the challenge to his crown well at first. Publicly, at least. But with the release of last year’s Possessor, Brandon came of Cronenberg age. And his father’s ego did not take well to this young upstart stealing the plaudits. Comments were made in various interviews by both parties and things soon spiraled out of control. It was obvious there was only one way to solve this.

Like Flies Around Shit

As soon as it became clear a Deathmatch was the only way to resolve the family feud, HBO came knocking. They offered to fund and televise the Cronenberg Deathmatch. The winner (and survivor) will be heralded as the head of the Cronenberg film family. The loser will spend their time dragging around whatever bits of metal and machinery they become fused with during the fight. They will question their existence, their place in the world and if there ever really was a physical world before the fusion of flesh and machine. They’ll also receive a runners up medal and HBO gift bag.

The Cronenberg V Cronenberg Deathmatch Airs On HBO Max and Amazon Prime This Fall.

JEFF GOLDBLUM GETS A JEFF GOLDBLUM TATTOO

HOLLYWOOD – Jeff Goldblum – star of Jurassic Park and The Fly – showed off a new tattoo earlier today… of himself!

The 61 year old actor and jazz musician Jeff Goldblum said that he’d always wanted to get a tattoo of himself ever since he was a struggling theatre actor over forty years ago.

People told me not to do it because if I ever had to do a nude scene, or even take my shirt off it would be distracting. And that was true when David Cronenberg got me to strip for The Fly he said straight away ‘Thank God you don’t have a tattoo of yourself. That would be really distracting!’ So I was lucky I hadn’t done it, but nowadays no one wants me to take my shirt off so I figure I’m safe. Unless maybe Wes Anderson asks me but in that case he’ll love it. He’ll think it’s quirky.

The reception to the news was predictably explosive with some calling for Goldblum to resign from whatever it is he actually does.

I’ve always been a controversial figure. I uhm tend to provoke a reaction wherever I go. Uhm, you see, I have so much … I guess you’d call it personality. I have a lot of that. When it came uhm to chooooosing a tattoo, my wife, Emily, said, hey! Why not get one of yourself? And as ever she was right. I remembered my dream and here we are. 

Jeff Goldblum is currently appearing.

5 FACTS YOU NEVER KNEW ABOUT JEFF GOLDBLUM

HOLLYWOOD – Everybody knows that Jeff Goldblum is the best actor in the world and a one man meme generator, but what do we really know about the man who still prefers to be known to his closest associates as Brundlefly?

The Studio Exec FACT Squad were so busy wondering whether they could they never once thought for a second about whether they should.

1 . Jeff Goldblum first appeared in the Charles Bronson 1974 vigilante movie Death Wish, where he was credited as ‘jiggy rapist 2’. He threw himself into the role totally and was arrested twice in New York in the run up to the film. The actor insisted that he had not ever been violent, he was cautioned for the misdemeanor of being excessively ‘jiggy’.

2 . Despite small roles in Annie Hall and Death Wish in the seventies, it wasn’t until the mid-eighties that Goldblum landed his first major role as Seth Brundle in the David Cronenberg body horror remake The Fly. Goldblum was so intent on making the film as authentic as possible that he employed his own acidic vomit and pulled off a number of fingernails to get the shot. ‘I believed the story was already fantastic and so there had to be something real in there for the audience to latch onto. I was that real,’ Goldblum told Gardener’s Weekly radio show in an interview on the original release of the movie.

3 .  The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension exists.

4. When Jeff Goldblum first met Steven Spielberg at a casting session for Jurassic Park, Goldblum wowed the director with his deft understanding of Chaos Theory, Quantum Mechanics and String Theory. It was only later that Spielberg learned that Goldblum had actually made the whole thing up on the spot and at one point was actually speaking Klingon. Spielberg kept some of Goldblum’s own dialogue in the film, so fascinated was he by the exuberance of the man.

5. As well as being an actor Jeff Goldblum also plays jazz flute.

For more FACTS on everything from this to that click HERE!

SAMUEL L. JACKSON TO STAR IN CRONENBERG’S ‘SUPER FLY’











HOLLYWOOD – Actor and all round loveable guy Samuel L. Jackson, has signed up to take the lead role in David Cronenberg’s movie mash-up Super Fly.

Set between the events of The Fly (1988) and The Fly II (1989). Jackson will play the character of Luscious Jones. A pimp and coke dealer who stumbles upon the teleportation equipment abandoned by Dr Seth Brundle after his unfortunate demise. In a drug fuelled haze Jones decides to turn on the machine which results in his DNA becoming spliced with that of a common house fly.

Back on the street and feeling the heat. Luscious runs into his old foe Pepper Joe. A rival pimp who wants in on his action. They fight, Pepper wins and Joe ends up in traction. In the hospital bed he’s out cold for a week. He wakes up and say’s “Doc. Just how long did I sleep?”. The doctor say’s “Lush. You was seven days gone. Your arm is all broke and your back is all wrong. But that ain’t it all and I don’t want to lie. Your heads been replaced by the head of a fly!”

Jones looks at himself. He’s a vain kinda guy. Then he shrugs and say’s “ F*ck. I’m a good looking fly”. Then he puts on his suit and he loads up his piece. “Tell my bitches i’m coming. They shall be released!”

With a soundtrack featuring the likes of James Brown, Curtis Mayfield and One Direction. Super Fly has all the makings of being the retro sci-fi horror blaxplotation film we have all been waiting for.

Super Fly is due for release in 2013.