REAL LIFE JASON BOURNE SAYS MATT DAMON HAS FORGOTTEN HIM

COLORADO – The real life secret agent that inspired Richard Ludlum to write the Jason Bourne books today slammed Matt Damon for forgetting him.

Fifty seven year old Jason Bourne from Fort Collins, Colorado today lashed out at Matt Damon for his deliberate amnesia towards his contribution to the character that has made Mr Damon a star.

When Richard asked if he could use me as a model I said yes. I was actually pleased for him to research the past which I could remember only with difficulty and then when Matt Damon was cast in the original film, The Bourne Identity, he came over to see me and spent a day trying to get my walk right. It was difficult because my walk is actually quite strange.

Things changed however with the success of the franchise.

Jeremy Renner didn’t even write me an email and Matt Damon, I’ve not seen at all this time round. One phone call. One. And that was just to tell me to stop sending the parcels of food. It ain’t as if I want to go on the red carpet or get paid a lot of money. I just want my contribution to be recognized.

However, filmmaker Paul Greengrass and Matt Damon have both issued statements that Jason Bourne simply has the same name as the fictional agent and the 57 year old postal worker should cease harassing the production.

Jason Bourne will be released next week.

5 FACTS YOU NEVER KNEW ABOUT MATT DAMON

HOLLYWOOD – The Facts about Matt Damon have long been hidden from public view, but the Studio Exec knows no fear, except for fear itself and litigation and so on we go with Good Will FACT Hunting if you will, which you probably won’t.

Matt Damon FACT attack alert:

  1. Matt Damon is NOT gay. Though frankly who gives a flying fish from a soul elevating Ang Lee film? That’s right not us buddy. Nor he. Tired of having to field rumors, he finally admitted that he wasn’t gay even though he said that he had too much respect for gay pals to deny it as if it was an accusation. Hats off Mr Damon. A class act.
  2. Damon is an inveterate gambler since his time working on the film Rounders. In fact his appearance in  Oceans 11, 12 and 13 were due to him losing a series of bets with George Clooney. His appearance in Saving Private Ryan ironically was a result of Steven Spielberg losing a bet with Ted Danson.
  3. Ben Affleck and Matt Damon famously wrote the screenplay for Good Will Hunting as a calling card for themselves as actors, although (as they later admitted) Damon did most of the writing, while Affleck did the ‘coloring in’.
  4. During the audition for The Bourne Identity Doug Liman was genuinely amazed by Damon’s method, turning up entirely unaware of what role he was auditioning for and actually trying to order a pastrami sandwich. Later Damon admitted he had mistaken the audition room for a Subway outlet due to the LSD he had dropped and had no idea what Bourne was until he attended the premiere.
  5. Matt Damon’s new films include Elysium, a Science Fiction drama featuring that Jodie Foster and Suggs a biopic of the lead singer of British reggae group Madness. He is currently in negotiations to buy Norway, because ‘it’s be kinda cool to have a country’. 

For more FACTS click HERE.