HOLLYWOOD – Following on from the Winnie The Pooh: Blood And Honey horror reimagining, a Paddington Bear horror reboot has been announced. The gore-fest will be directed by Eli Roth and begins shooting later this summer. The Exec caught up with eternal frat boy horror aficionado, Roth as he finalized pre-production on the Paddington Bear horror reboot.
Eli, What Attracted You To A Paddington Bear Horror Reboot?
Hey bros. You know me, when it comes to bucking horror trends, I’m Phi Beta Kappa. I was never on board the torture porn trend with Hostel. Nor was I on board the remake gravy train with Death Wish. And I will never be on the videogame movie band wagon with Borderlands. When I heard there was an opportunity to make a beloved children’s bear character into a horror icon, I leaped at the chance. Here was another opportunity to prove what an original creative force I am.
Can You Tell Us Anything About The Plot?
Only a little. It’s going to be a home invasion story. Where a Peruvian immigrant bear stalks and terrorizes the Brown family. Think The Purge crossed with Straw Dogs, but he’s not a dog. He’s a bear and he’s not made of straw. I never got why they called it Straw Dogs. What kind of stupid title is that? It should’ve been called Shootsie or The Graduate II: Braddock’s Revenge. That would have been way cooler, bro.
Can You Tell Us Any Cast News?
I shouldn’t really, but you seem like a cool dude, man. We got Robert Englund playing Henry Brown and Sybil Danning as Mary Brown.
And Who Is Playing Paddington?
We got Andy Serkis in a mo-cap suit providing the movements, but we aint using him for the voice. We have Rob Zombie providing the voice. He brings a real guttural heft to the character that has never been explored before. Plus he sounds like he’d tear you a new assshole.
Paddington Bear: Flesh Shredder Starts Filming Shortly
Barry Marbles worked for forty five years in the British film industry, working his way up from tea boy to gaffer, via key grip. And now he is prepared to let you in on the behind the scenes of what he personally has never called the Dream Factorium. This week he lifts the lid on one of the most controversial films of the seventies: Sam Peckinpah’s Straw Dogs.
When Mr. Peckinpah came over to England he was famous for two things: slow motion violence and hating women. It also turned out he didn’t like men none to much neither.
I was preparing the lighting rig inside the cottage where much of the film was done and it was very complex. There were quite a few of us on the job and in comes Mr. Peckinpah wearing a bandanna and shouting and hollering all sorts of profanity. The air turned quite blue. And this in front of the apprentices.
So I stood up and I said, ‘Mr. Peckinpah, I shall be needing you to lower your voice.’
Of course, that set him off even worse and he started effing and jeffing and calling me all the names under the sun. The air turned quite blue. So very gently I took his hand as if to shake but then quick as a light I slapped it on the kitchen table and drove the Philips head screwdriver right through the back of his hand effectively nailing it to the wood. Oh, he did scream and rock about and beg and scream again, weeping and begging me to stop grinding at it the way I was doing.
‘It happens quite quick in real life, doesn’t it sir?’ says I.
After that we had what I would call an understanding and the rest of the shoot went very smoothly.
HOLLYWOOD – I’ll never forget Sam Peckinpah. Oh that I could. He was a maverick, a trickster, fighter, a visionary and a genuine pain in the butt. We were shooting Pat Garret and Billy the Kid. Bob Dylan and Harry Dean Stanton had been raising hullabaloo and had spoiled the take. Peckinpah launched himself at them, punching Dylan in the face, kicking Harry Dean Stanton’s legs from under him and jumped up and down on his head with both feet. H.D. lost his perfect cut glass English accent (often compared to Gielgud) and began to speak the way he does now for the rest of his life.
However, Peckinpah had a soft side. He didn’t have much time for animals and he despised children, and loathed women, but he loved delicate hand made dolls houses, which he would buy for huge sums of money and arrange around his house before smashing them all with a mallet he kept expressly for that purpose
We were making Straw Dogs in England and I remember Sam leafing through the catalogs for hours searching for a perfect replica of Chequers.
Dustin Hoffman made some off hand remark regarding the machismo of dolls houses. Sam through himself at him, kneeing him in the groin and the pulling him off the floor by a clamp like grip he had on Dustin nose. What he did next was a major factor in Dustin’s success in the role Tootsie, but as my old friend Sir Edwin Fluffer often says, that’s another story.
The Studio Exec recounted this story to Chad.