SCARLETT JOHANSSON TO REPLACE JEFFREY TAMBOR IN TRANSPARENT

HOLLYWOOD – Scarlett Johansson will replace Jeffrey Tambor in the new season of Transparent.

Versatile chameleon-like actress Scarlett Johansson is to play Maura Pfefferman, the role originated by Jeffrey Tambor in the next season of Transparent. Johansson popped in to the Studio Exec bungalow yesterday to talk about the new challenge:

I’ve done Asian. I’m now doing Trans. So what? You got a problem Exec, take it up with Emma fucking Stone.

Whoa! Hold your horses, Black Widow!

Yeah. And when I do the Black Widow movie, you know what we’re going to discover?

Black Widow’s actually black?

Damned right. How did you know?

A guess. So Transparent…

Yeah, I loved the series and Jeffrey’s work. But then the unfortunate accusations happened and he had to go away. Christopher Plummer is busy shooting Roseanne so I decided to step in. I’m already making a trans movie with Rub & Tug, so I reckon I’m as qualified as anyone else to play the part.

What about asking a trans actor to play the role?

Yeah, and we should get Abraham Lincoln to play Abraham Lincoln. Pur-lease!

Transparent is out in the Fall.

MELISSA MCCARTHY SIGNS ON FOR ROSEANNE

HOLLYWOOD – Melissa McCarthy is to take over as Roseanne Connor following the firing of Roseanne Barr.

Season two of the groundbreaking sitcom Roseanne will star Melissa McCarthy in the role of the Roseanne Connor, the working mother who keeps her blue collar family together with her sharp witty tongue.John Goodman is on board to play her husband Dan.

McCarthy had this to say about the project:

I’ve always been a huge fan of Roseanne Barr. For me she was a hero and a role model. She broke a lot of ground as a comedian for women and when ABC came to me with the idea I thought it sounded amazing. I agreed straight away.

How will your approach differ?

I’m not going to take Ambien. That’s for starters.  I think my version is going to be less angry and bitter. She’s going to spend less time on Twitter and more time investigating paranormal activity. In order to lighten the mood a little, I’ve also introduced a concept I’d like to call ‘Ghostbusting’.

Ghostbusting?

Having lost her job, Dan and I start up a new business where they investigate and capture paranormal activity and amusing CGI apparitions.

That sounds…

Absolutely amazing. I know, right?

Roseanne returns to ABC in 2021.

Image courtesy of @ThePixelFactor.

 

ROSEANNE TO FEATURE DONALD TRUMP GUEST SPOT

HOLLYWOOD – ABC’s new sitcom Roseanne will feature a cameo from President Donald Trump.

Revived sitcom Roseanne will have a high powered guest star in the coming episodes. President Donald Trump is apparently so enamored of the show he called star Roseanne and offered to appear in an episode.

A source close to the show had this to say:

Roseanne has spoken with the President and he was keen to get on the show as quickly as possible. I know that we already have some story lines worked out, including Roseanne getting a job as Trump’s communications director, following the departure of Hopes Hicks. The only thing we’re not clear about is whether this is just a story or whether the President intends to take on the comedian in the role as well as appear in the episode.

Other possible story lines include POTUS grabbing Roseanne’s pussy cat when it leaps on his lap. And confessing he has a cat allergy.

Roseanne airs on ABC.

 

MELISSA MCCARTHY SIGNS ON FOR ROSEANNE

HOLLYWOOD – Melissa McCarthy is to star in a remake of the late 80s early 90s sitcom Roseanne for Netflix.

The new Netflix version of Roseanne Barr’s groundbreaking sitcom Roseanne will star Melissa McCarthy in the role of the Roseanne Connor, the working mother who keeps her blue collar family together with her sharp witty tongue. Kevin James is on board to play her husband Dan.

McCarthy had this to say about the project:

I’ve always been a huge fan of Roseanne Barr. For me she was a hero and a role model. She broke a lot of ground as a comedian for women and when Netflix came to me with the idea I thought it sounded amazing. I agreed straight away.

Will the show be updated?

Absolutely. The original Roseanne was very much of its time. It was a show that spoke to the Clinton years really. Aspirational and working class. There was an optimism despite all the hardship and hard times. Nowadays, things have changed. We have a Trump presidency to look forward to and I think my Roseanne is going to be angrier and more bitter. She’s going to spend a lot of time on Twitter rants and working out why the bank are foreclosing on her house. In order to lighten the mood a little, I’ve also introduced a concept I’d like to call ‘Ghostbusting’.

Ghostbusting?

Having lost her job, Dan and Roseanne start up a new business where they investigate and capture paranormal activity and amusing CGI apparitions.

That sounds…

Absolutely amazing. I know, right?

The Netflix original series will drop twenty episodes some time early in 2017.

Image courtesy of @ThePixelFactor.