LETITIA WRIGHT FLAT EARTH MOVIE GREENLIT

HOLLYWOOD – MCU fans have been given a treat with the surprise announcement a new Letitia Wright Flat Earth movie has been greenlit. In a bold new venture, being funded by Facebook and The Republican Party, the Letitia Wright flat earth film starts filming as soon as Letitia finishes working on Black Panther: Wakanda Forever. The Exec caught up with the star to discuss her new project.


Letitia, Tell Us More About This New Project

Quick, draw those blinds. These bungalow windows are far too big. Satellites could be filming us and listening to our every word. And you know what that means, don’t you? It means Bill fucking Gates and his beady little eyes crawling all over us. Ugh. That creepy motherfucker.

Would You Like To Sit Down Rather Than Pacing Around?

No, I can’t sit still. If I do, they’ll get a fix on me and shoot me with their flying nano-bots. You don’t think they get those things into you just by so-called vaccines, do you? They’re fucking everywhere man. Chariots of the gods, you know what I mean? Look, it’s really easy to follow. They can’t just get us all to take the mind-controlling vaccine. Many have, and believe me, they’ll be sorry, those stupid, pandemic-reducing motherfuckers. But they’re trying to get the nano-bots into the rest of us by invisible drones flying around and dropping their mind control shit onto our food and into our drinks without us even noticing.

Are You Feeling Ok?

That’s what my ex-manager said to me just before I fired her. She was blind to the truth. Just like those bastards at Marvel. That’s why I let them let me finish early on Black Panther: Wakanda Forever. Those mask-wearing sheep couldn’t handle the truth.

Are You Going To Tell Us About This Flat Earth Film Or What?

I’m in it, you piece of shit.

Flat Earth: The Movie Starts Shooting Soon

DONALD TRUMP HIRES NEW ADVISORS

NEW YORK – Billionaire, TV Reality star, mogul and now Presidential candidate for the Republican Party, Donald Trump today announced that he has hired a new set of political advisers to correct the course of his fledgling campaign.

Donald Trump published a statement from Trump Tower, welcoming his new collaborators and predicting great things:

I firmly believe in the role of greatness in America. Eisenhower had it; I have it and perhaps Tom Clancy had it. Now however our country, which is in danger of tipping up with the weight of Mexican rapists entering from the South, has become a country of the small minded and the fearful. Having utterly misunderstood the message I tried to convey I have hired a new team of political advisers, whose role it will be to make sure that message is heard by as many people as possible and that dissenting voices are not allowed to besmirched its purity with criticism of any kind whatsoever. I have seen their work in two films, including one where they really held their own without the lead character.

Although Donald Trump is currently high among the ranks of Republican hopefuls, currently placed second, his candidature is seen by many as a political disaster waiting to happen for the GOP. Several business and media partners have withdrawn from collaborations as a direct response to some of his more inflammatory rhetoric. Political commentator Horse Stephenson believes however that Donald J. Trump is far from being a cartoon candidate.

Not at all. Any who think he’s a joke should remember how many thought that old ham of an actor Ronald Reagan didn’t stand a chance when he stood. The Republican Party has a hankering for forceful leadership and business based celebrity. And his new team are a crack bunch of analysts and advisers. They have also proven their worth in distracting the public’s attention both from what comes out of Mr. Trump’s mouth and what is on the top of Mr. Trump’s head.

The US Presidential elections are not until after Star Wars 8.

Image courtesy of @ThePixelFactor.

PRESIDENT SNOW WINS REPUBLICAN PRIMARY


MISSISSIPPI – President Snow – best known for his part in the Hunger Games franchise – has won the Republican Senate Primary in Mississippi unseating Senator Thad Cochran and setting up a possible run for President in 2016.

Snow, who ran as an independent Tea Party candidate, said that he was committed to preserving and protecting the rights and privileges of the one percent and the unity of Panem:

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