NIGHTCRAWLER: REVIEW

NIGHTCRAWLER: REVIEW – Donnie Darko (Jake Gyllenhaal) is a small time thief and socio-path who finds his niche as an ambulance chasing stringer, grabbing footage of gory accidents and crime scenes for a local news station run by Rene Russo.

Despite having a name that even he can’t spell (for more on that story CLICK HERE) and the unwiped orifice that was The Prince of Persia, Jake Gyllenhaal adds another impressive character study to what is becoming a pantheon of outsiders and weirdos, from the sniper of Jarhead, the obsessive journalist in Zodiac, the doomed love of Brokeback Mountain finally to the wonderful weirdness of Enemy.

A Travis Bickle like loner and empty man, Lou Bloom’s emaciated frame has an insect like intentness. His hunger is not simply physical. His eyes are wide, not because of innocence but rather so he can catch everything and use it to his advantage. In fact, Lou isn’t guilty as such he is simply responsive and Dan Gilroy – brother of Michael Clayton’s Tony Gilroy – has crafted a lean and intense amorality tale.

Lou is a creature who can feed off the ‘if it bleeds, it leads’ ethos and the voyeurism which is another step away. His psychopathy allows him to play the game and keep one step ahead of the more experienced competition, represented by Bill Paxton’s old hand. A blend of Drive and Network, this is cool LA noir sharpened to a keen satirical purpose

For more Reviews CLICK HERE .

 

JAKE GYLLENHAAL CANNOT SPELL OWN NAME

HOLLYWOOD – Nightcrawler actor Jake Gyllenhaal admitted today to not being able to spell his own name.

‘I never remember how many Ls there are supposed to be,’ Donnie Darko admitted EXCLUSIVELY to the Studio Exec.

I know it sounds ridiculous but it was one of those things that even as a kid I couldn’t do. The teachers would tell me, ‘Jake, you have to learn.’ But I was much more interested in gazing out of the window and wondering whether one day I could be a movie star, like Kurt Russell. At first I was really ashamed, but as I grew up and began earning money and appearing in films, I just thought who gives a shit and I sign my autographs with an unreadable squiggle so no one will suspect.

What about contracts or legal documents?

Oh, that’s easy. I just sign those with my initials JL.

But surely your initials are JG?

Oh, shit, you know I think you might be right.

Maggie Gyllenhaal, Jake’s sister, commented:

Jake is such a baby. I mean seriously. Sit down and learn to spell you’re own name. How hard can it be? And do you want to know the truly outrageous thing?

Yes.

It isn’t just his surname he has difficulty with.

Nightcrawler is on general release.

JAKE GYLLENHAAL STEALS BEN AFFLECK’S ACTING BEARD

HOLLYWOOD – ‘Actor’ Jake Gyllenhaal was arrested today following accusations that he had stolen Ben Affleck’s best acting beard.

The beard – which was thought by many to be responsible for Affleck’s Oscar triumph in Argo some years ago – had gone missing from the night stand by Affleck’s bed nine months ago. Fingers had immediately pointed at Jennifer Garner who many believed had been wearing it somewhere on her person in an attempt for Oscar recognition in her supporting role in Dallas Buyers Club, something she has vehemently denied. 

Suspicion then alighted on Gyllenhaal after Hugh Jackman told the press that ‘blinky’ [as he prefers to call Gyllenhaal] had loaned him a beard while they were filming Prisoners, but wouldn’t tell him from whence it came. Police were finally alerted on seeing Enemy in which Gyllenhaal wears not one but two beards! Gyllenhaal’s lawyers have denied he stole the chin herbage and has never even been to Hawaii. 

The case looks set to go to trial in August.