HOLLYWOOD – Netflix have confirmed that a film based on their documentary series Making a Murderer is due to roll into production later this year.
“The phone hasn’t stop ringing since we put the show on the service,” said a Netflix spokesman.
Most of the time it’s people crying, or swearing, or crying and swearing. Mel Gibson left us a three hour answering message explaining his theory of who really did it but we assured him that Steven Spielberg has an alibi for the night in question.
Although no director is attached to the project, David Lynch has expressed an interest in taking the helm:
Manitowoc is a weird city full of strange, grotesque characters. Usually it takes me years to come up with that shit but it’s all there. The place is practically a Twin Peaks theme park and I reckon the story would make an interesting movie.
Twitter is already speculating which actors will take on the main roles with Leonardo DiCaprio the current frontrunner to play Steven Avery but it’s the role of former district attorney Ken Kratz that is causing the most interest after Daniel Day-Lewis allegedly attended a Christmas fancy dress party as the man himself.
“We were all waiting for Daniel to arrive when suddenly, Ken Kratz walked in,” said an anonymous party goer:
He was immediately set upon and we’d just fashioned a make-shift scaffold and put a noose around his neck when we realised it was Daniel and everyone fell about laughing.
Kratz was unavailable for comment but he did send us these text messages:
Hey, sexy. I’m kind of a big shot. Maybe you can come over and sit on my face and tell me I’m the King. – K
Er, sorry, that text message was sent by Steven Avery. They just found my phone in his cell. He escaped, stole my phone and then broke back into prison. I’ve got proof! Well, I will have proof. Give me a few days.
MAKING A MURDERER: THE MOVIE IS DUE 2017