NEW YORK – It has been revealed that popular 1980s computer generated TV show host Max Headroom is actually Donald Trump’s illegitimate son.
Max Headroom was a figure popular in the Eighties for about twenty minutes. No one knew the origins or the parentage of the blockheaded humorist, but the Studio Exec can now EXCLUSIVELY reveal that he is the illegitimate son of property tycoon and Presidential candidate Donald Trump. Headroom, who now hosts a radio show in Anchorage, Alaska, had this to say:
My father and mother had a brief fling in the late sixties and when my mother told Donald she was pregnant he told her to put the child, me, up for adoption. My mother was actually an early generation IBM mainframe computer and I don’t know exactly how Donald managed to impregnate her but I think it was similar to the film Tron. Through the years, my dad had little interest in connecting with me. Although when I first appeared on television he did want to connect because he liked the idea of being a guest. Since then I’ve come to some family gatherings and I have met Ivanka and Eric and Donald. I haven’t had the opportunity to meet Barron yet.
The campaign office of Donald Trump refused to issue a comment.
Donald Trump will be the next President of the United States of America.
LONDON – Max Headroom – the cult British TV film from 1985 – is finally going to get a big screen makeover in the capable hands of Sam Mendes and starring House of Cards chameleon Kevin Spacey.
The original film featured Matt Frewer playing a journalist, Edison Carter, in a dystopian future who investigates why couch potatoes are exploding while watching television. After an accident, Carter is computerized and becomes the titular Max Headroom, a wisecracking TV host who helps boost ratings.
The original film was directed by Rocky Morton and Annabel Jankell, the creative team guilty for Super Mario Bros – widely regarded as one of the best films ever made. Max Headroom was entirely remade as a TV show with all the weird gory bits removed, but alas to little success.
The Motion Picture version has long been a dream of Sam Mendes,who hopes to follow up his success at rejuvenating 007 with yet another resurrection:
When I was making American Beauty me and Kevin Spacey would yak about how great it would be to make Max Headroom rather than waste our lives on the arse wipery that was American Beauty, that stinking bucket of sewer soup made film.
Spacey also marks his love of Max Headroom as an inspiration.
As a young boy, with nary an idea in my head as to what to do with myself, Max Headroom represented more than a character. It was the possibility to transform myself into a totally different being. You want to know who Kaiser Soze is? Max Headroom is Kaiser Soze.
Max Headroom is due to be released on April 17th, 2021.