STEVEN SPIELBERG TO FILM HAMILTON

HOLLYWOOD – Steven Spielberg will film the movie version of the hit Broadway musical Hamilton.

According to sources close to Steven Spielberg, the Jurassic Park director is set to film hit Broadway movie Hamilton. The source told the Studio Exec EXCLUSIVELY:

Steven got the idea after the cast spoke up when Mike Pence visited the production soon after Donald Trump’s election. He felt that the musical had not become such a phenomenon that he could do something special with it. Plus, he always wanted to make a musical and so this is it.

We immediately phoned Steven for confirmation. He said:

How did you guys know? Was it Kathleen spilling the beans? Oh, cripes. Gosh. Well, yeah. We were hoping to keep it under wraps. In fact I’d told everyone I was making West Side Story and we’d been auditioning the cast on that basis but all along it was for Hamilton.

Lin-Manuel Miranda is closely involved in the project, Spielberg confirmed.

He is an essential component. The way I see it is the film is a prequel to Lincoln. In fact, I’m also in talks with Daniel Day-Lewis to re-film some scenes of Lincoln but with singing.

Didn’t he retire?

Not anymore.

Hamilton is to be released in 2020.

DANIEL DAY-LEWIS REVEALS THAT HE’S BEEN PLAYING 007 FOR THREE DECADES

LONDON – Oscar winning actor Daniel Day-Lewis today revealed that he’s been playing James Bond 007 for thirty years.

Lincoln, There Will Be Blood and My Left Foot actor, Daniel Day-Lewis today fessed up to another role, secret agent 007, James Bond.

Speaking EXCLUSIVELY to the Studio Exec, Day-Lewis said:

The producers approached me in the late eighties about playing James Bond. I was reluctant at first. Timothy Dalton seemed to have done everything possible with the character. The idea of going head to head with him freaked me out. But they insisted and so I finally said yes. As you know my preparation is extensive. I read all the novels and studied the character very closely. I try to get to the core of every character and often that comes down to a single word. With Lincoln, it was ‘leadership’. Daniel Plainview it’s ‘greed’.  For James Bond it’s ‘secrecy.’

Secrecy?

Shhhhh. Perhaps, I’ve told you too much.

No please. Go on.

It seemed to me that everyone had missed this vital component of Bond’s story. So I began to play him, secretly. Under the radar. No one suspected a thing.

You didn’t let anyone know.

What kind of secret agent would tell everyone he’s a secret agent? And Bond is supposed to be the best of the best. So that’s what I did. I would introduce myself as Day-Lewis, Daniel Day-Lewis, because I decided that was the cover name that Bond would use.

And now that Daniel Craig is possibly moving on…?

I’ve already made the film.

You have?

It’s called Too Many Cocks. As in Too Many Cooks Spoil the Broth. But with the word Cocks instead of Cooks. It’s fantastic. It’s got sex, car chases, gun fights. And this amazing battle inside a Volcano at the end.

When will we see it?

Haven’t you been listening? I can’t release it.

Why not?

It would blow my cover. Wait, you’re not recording this are you?

Too Many Cocks will be released in 2019.

DANIEL DAY-LEWIS: ‘I REGRET BULLYING GANDHI’

HOLLYWOOD – Lincoln and There Will Be Blood actor Daniel Day-Lewis has spoken for the first time about his regret at bullying Mahatma Gandhi.

Oscar winning actor Daniel Day-Lewis today spoke of his profound regret at having bullied Indian national independence leader and renowned pacifist Mahatma Gandhi:

I was a very young man at the time. We were living in South Africa and Gandhi was living there as well. One day I saw him walking down the street and I was with some friends and I thought it would be an idea to have some fun with him so I blocked his way. Of course, this was South Africa and we were all a bunch of terrible racists at the time. Also Gandhi was not actually famous at the time. He was a young lawyer working on the rights for the coloureds in South Africa. But none of that is important and I’m deeply ashamed of my behavior looking back now. It makes me feel even worse that Gandhi got shot before I could express my remorse to him personally.

Gandhi and Daniel Day-Lewis both won Oscars.

ROBERT DE NIRO JOINS SHIA LABEOUF FOR #ALLMYMOVIES

NEW YORK – At the Angelika theatre in New York, Shia LaBeouf has been joined by Robert de Niro to watch the rest of Shia LaBeouf’s movies back to back in a marathon.

Robert de Niro showed up at the Angelika theater today in New York today to join Shia LaBeouf in his marathon of Shia LaBeouf movies the #AllMyMovies event.

Mr. De Niro spoke EXCLUSIVELY to the Studio Exec about his participation in what is being billed as either the most interesting art project of the century or alternatively the moment the new millennium disappeared up its own asshole:

 Shia LaBeouf is the most interesting actor of his generation and I am not going to just be a part of the project, I also want to actually see his Transformers trilogy again.

What fascinates you about Shia?

In a word his range. He has such an incredible range. Look at Bobby and then look at what he does in Fury. Or look at Disturbia and compare it to his role Nymphomaniac. And it isn’t only me, I don’t know a serious actor who doesn’t greatly esteem Shia. The new film that Daniel Day Lewis is making about Shia…

That’s still happening?

Oh absolutely, but you know Daniel. He wants to be absolutely perfect. Especially because it’s Shia. He is more committed to this than he ever was to Lincoln. And he loved Lincoln.

Is there anything you’d help Shia with in terms of his acting?

Are you kidding? I’m the one asking him advice. I wished he’d been there when I was making Taxi Driver, or Raging Bull. I’m sure he would have given me some good notes. I asked him the other day if he could help me with my recent performances. He said he’d seen The Intern. And he emailed me his reaction.

What did he write?

Three words: ‘Do it again’.

Image courtesy of @ThePixelFactor.

DID OLIVER STONE KILL ABRAHAM LINCOLN?

HOLLYWOOD – A new book by maverick director Oliver Stone claims that the Platoon director was directly involved in the successful plot to assassinate the 16th President of the United States of America, Abraham Lincoln.

The second most famous presidential assassination – after that of William McKinley – the murder of President Lincoln in 1865 sent shock waves through the USA, following his successful resolution of the Civil War. For years it was believed that his assassin was the actor and Southern rebel John Wilkes Booth, but a new book by Cornell Historian Anthony Guber Stoned to Death: Oliver Stone and the Death of Abraham Lincoln: including an Appendix on Pearl Harbor and the Illuminati posits the thesis that director Oliver Stone (born 99 years subsequent to the President’s demise) was the actual assassin.

The book reads:

Records show that Oliver Stone joined the army in 1967 and fought in Vietnam. What they don’t show is that after his first tour of duty he was recruited into a special covert group of the US Army specializing in Time War. As Lincoln had placed legal limits on the days (no fighting on Sundays and Wednesdays Law) on which the army could fight in 1866, severely hampering the effort to defeat Communism in South East Asia, this group decided on a radical plan to assassinate Lincoln before he signed the law. Stone was chosen because of his creativity and aim. His whole career has been something of an extended apology and covert confession of his crime. JFK in particular sees him project his guilt into a convoluted conspiracy against another president, but if you switch Kennedy for Lincoln, then you have what is essentially a mea culpa.

The author cites other evidence such as the fact that Daniel Day Lewis in preparing for the role of Lincoln in Spielberg’s film of the same name, received extensive coaching from Stone on ‘authenticity’. And an interview with French cultural magazine Chapeau in which Stone stated:

Of course I’m delighted that Obama is our President but people keep saying he’s our first black president. They forget that Frederick Douglas became President after Abraham Lincoln endorsed him. Oh wait… I killed Lincoln didn’t I?

Oliver Stone was unavailable for comment.

TOP 5 MOVIES WITH PEOPLE IN THEM

HOLLYWOOD – In our relentless mission to list every single aspect of cinema and film making the Studio Exec is proud to present a list of 5 movies that have people in them.

The Studio Exec FACT Squad was sent through the archives and watched every film ever made and here are the top five films with people in them:

  1. The Crowd. You want people, you’ve got them. There are loads of people here. In fact so many that the 1928 film is actually called The Crowd. The only problem is that you can’t hear them. It isn’t because they can’t speak; it’s because this film was made in a time period when they didn’t record sound with films, but this King Vidor silent classic is well worth the watch. And it is the only film to be directed by an actual monarch.
  2. Solyent Green. ‘Solyent Green?’ you say. ‘I see Charlton Heston but where are the people?’ Well, actually Solyent Green itself is… oops almost a SPOILER. Phew, just avoided. But aside from Solyent Green being people, the whole film is based on Harry Harrison’s novel of over-population Make Room Make Room!
  3. Cleopatra. There are so many people in the Roman epic that Italy had to stop doing everything on the day it was filmed, so that everyone could work as extras on the film. Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor starred as Marc Antony and Cleopatra, both of whom are also people.
  4. Lincoln. Directed by Steven Spielberg, this film starred Daniel Day Lewis as the 16th President of the United States of America. It really is a film for the people, about the people and by the people.
  5. Barry Lyndon. Considered by many to be Stanley Kubrick’s dullest film, other people argue it is one of his best. There’s a person in the actual title and other as he journeys from his home in Ireland, across Europe, his fortunes rising and falling along the way, he meets even more people, including a card sharp and his future wife! Ryan O’Neal plays the main person.

For more FACTS click HERE.

DANIEL DAY-LEWIS CONFIRMS SHIA: THE MOVIE

HOLLYWOOD – Lincoln star, Daniel Day-Lewis is in the midst of intensive preparation for his next role, playing the actor Shia LaBeouf in David Lynch’s long-awaited epic bio-pic Shia.

The star of Last of the Mohicans, In the Name of the Father and My Left Foot, Daniel Day-Lewis spoke to the Studio Exec EXCLUSIVELY about the project:

I have been entering the character backwards. Slowly I’ve been forgetting how to act, I’ve denuded myself of charisma, I am becoming a blank canvas.

On which to paint your character?

No just a blank canvas. That’ll probably be it.

The film began initially as a dream project of Martin Scorsese but he got cold feet around the time that Transformers 4: The Age of Extinction came out.

‘How can I compete with that?’ he was heard to shriek as he ran from the theatre.

Ron Howard then came aboard and that was when Day-Lewis also found himself interested in the role (for more on that story CLICK HERE).

Howard himself was to back out, awed by the enormity of the task and now the project’s current director David Lynch is ready to begin shooting. For Lynch – whose fame today resides mainly on the rumor he once ate a squirrel – Shia will be his final film.

David Lynch said:

At first I was very nervous. I’ve played great Americans before. Abraham Lincoln, Bill the Butcher, Daniel Plainview. But could I bring myself to play the greatest American currently alive, after Adam Sandler? I don’t know. But I’m going to try. What I say quite seriously in my quiet little voice is that after Shia what else will I have to say? What else will anyone have to say?

Shia LaBeouf is currently not acting in a Broadway play because it was ‘difficult’.

Shia will be released in 2016.

AN APPEAL FROM STEVEN SPIELBERG

HOLLYWOOD – Hi, my name is Steven Spielberg, director of such great films as Close Encounters of the Third Kind, Jaws, Raiders of the Lost Ark, Lincoln, War Horse, Sugarland Express, Schindler’s List, Jurassic Park, Catch Me If You Can, Saving Private Ryan, Amistad, Hook, 1941, The Color Purple, Empire of the Sun, Munich and Always.

You might also know me from my executive producer credits on ER, Falling Skies, the Transformers series and many other TV Shows and films. Oh, I also kind of directed Poltergeist, but shhhhh. 

But today I don’t want to talk to you as the director of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, Tin Tin the Secret of the Unicorn and certainly not as the director of The Terminal … to tell you the truth I always try and forget that one. 

No. I’m here to talk to you as a normal human being. A simple man. Cast from your mind Jurassic Park: The Lost World and Duel. Not to mention the beguiling science fiction fairy tales A.I. and E.T. And let’s not get into my cameo role in The Blues Brothers, or those documentaries I made about the Second World War and President Obama. And what’s the point in dredging up the segment of The Twilight Zone movie and those episodes of Columbo I was involved with? I was a young man, a kid and no one knew me. It just isn’t relevant to the point I want to make and this very important issue which I would like to shine a light on today.

So PLEASE sign the petition and remember to give generously. Thank You.


Steven Spielberg

DANIEL DAY-LEWIS ASKS FOR NINE TO BE DELETED

DUBLIN – In a bid to repair his reputation, Abraham Lincoln impersonator Daniel Day-Lewis has requested that all remaining negatives, DVDs, blu-rays and digital copies of Nine be gathered together and destroyed.

‘It’s very simple,’ said Dana Cook, once famous as half of Wayne’s World but now Daniel Day-Lewis’ bag man and PR agent. ‘Daniel has a nearly flawless career, with masterpiece after masterpiece. My Beautiful Launderette, Last of the Mohicans, My Left Foot, In the Name of the Father and even smaller films like The Ballad of Jack and Rose or The Boxer and then there’s a large film-shaped turd like Nine.’

Day-Lewis has also allegedly approached Martin Scorsese about recutting Gangs of New York. Dana Cook agrees:

Yes we did have a conversation with Marty. Daniel was very pleased with the work he did on that picture as Bill the Butcher, he really felt he created the character, but unfortunately there’s that great big ass, Cameron Diaz, gallumphing about the film and utterly ruining it. Dan felt snip, snip and the film… nay the world would be a better place.

According to Cook, Scorsese is seriously considering a new Director’s Cut of the film for release in 2014.

LINCOLN:REVIEW













From the off it’s historically inaccurate. Lincoln doesn’t kill any vampires nor does he travel into the future with Bill & Ted in order to help them pass their history exam. Instead we get an hour and fifty minutes of him yapping on about equality and freeing slaves from the evil clutches of Monsieur Calvin Candie.

Spielberg, still suffering post traumatic stress after the diabolical War Horse portrays old Abe as a living saint who at any given moment could sprout angel wings and ascend into heaven. His claim that it is a work of “historical fiction”is merely a smokescreen to hide the numerous inaccuracies. In reality Mary Todd Lincoln had a third nipple, General Ulysses Grant didn’t like cheese sandwiches and Robert Lincoln’s moustache curled down, rather than up.

That being said what the film does get right on the money is the undisputed fact that a bunch of rich white men ended slavery. The years of campaigning and pressure from African Americans, The American Anti-slavery Society and various women’s movements had absolutely NO bearing on events. It was Lincoln, his Republican henchmen and the Democrats he bribed who won the prize and you’d be a fool and a Communist to suggest otherwise.

Still it’s good to see James Spader is having seconds of pudding these days and Daniel Day -Lewis looks exactly like Daniel Day-Lewis in an Abraham Lincoln costume. All in all a dawdling Sunday afternoon yarn that you shouldn’t watch whilst operating heavy machinery.

FLUFFER: LINCOLN

Me and Danny

Resident inebriate and charmer, Sir Edwin Fluffer gives us a fascinating insight into the making of the years most popular films.


This was quite simply the finest ensemble cast I’ve had the honour to appear with since Hollywood Canteen. I was very taken aback when the phone rang and I answered it to none other than Steven Spielberg! ‘Is that Sir Tom Courtenay?’ he said. ‘No,’ I replied, ‘it’s Sir Edwin Fluffer.’ ‘You’ll do,’ he said and I was on set the very next day! Of course this meant there was no time to rehearse and my performance may have suffered a little as a result.

Two bottles of champagne on the flight over and some terrible jet lag the next day didn’t help much either.  If I had to describe Daniel Day-Lewis as an actor I’d use the word ‘fussy’, but his father was a friend and his limericks did make me laugh. It all went wrong when Tommy Lee Jones bet me $20 that I couldn’t throw a peanut and get it to land on Danny’s top hat. Hal Holbrook was brought in to re-shoot all my scenes, so it was like Into The Wild all over again!