RESERVOIR DOGS DIRECTOR’S CUT TO INCLUDE DELETED BANK ROBBERY

HOLLYWOOD – Quentin Tarantino will release a director’s cut of his debut hit Reservoir Dogs which will include the much discussed but never seen bank robbery.

Reservoir Dogs has to go down as one of the best debut movies ever. Quentin Tarantino was 29 years old when he unleashed the blood-splattered crime thriller on audiences. And in the process inspiring a host of copycats. In the film a bunch of professional criminals first plot and then deal with the aftermath of a heist. Although we hear all about what happened, we never actually witness the mayhem.

However, in a new theatrical release we are finally going to see what went down as Tarantino puts back in one of the most famous deleted scenes ever. He told the Studio Exec:

We were making the film for very little and so the scene that was most important, the robbery, was, I think, a little clunky. There were basically technical problems to do with lighting, grading etc. that made it unuseable. However, now with technology we can actually fix that and put it back in.

Wow.

When we showed the film at Sundance, everyone thought I was being clever, not showing the robbery. I let them think that because I didn’t want to disappoint. Now enough time has passed and finally, you’ll be able to see the film I wanted to make.

Can you give us a taste?

Yeah. There are things that are really funny that in the original film didn’t make sense. For instance, you know how Harvey Keitel is talking to Tim Roth about the manager being Charles Bronson. Well, when they get in the bank Charles Bronson is actually the manager and they do this double-take!

Hilarious. How the hell did you get Charles Bronson?

He was a good friend of Harvey’s so he agreed to do it for free. Then Michael Madsen mentions Lee Marvin…

I bet you’re a real Lee Marvin fan!

Yeah, exactly. So Lee Marvin is there as a customer. Not actually Lee Marvin, because he died a few years earlier but a lookalike.

So it was a lot more comic. 

Yes. And you how Mr. Blue gets wasted. It was pretty strong. He gets his face entirely shot off. And he’s running around without his face. It’s shocking, but it’s also really funny.

Are there any other deleted scenes?

There is a whole section where Mr. Orange just paints his toenails. Of course in the original cut if you look carefully you can feel that Tim has his toenails painted but you don’t see when he did it. Oh and there’s another five minutes at the end. An alternate ending. We find out what really happens. I call it my Lindelof ending.

Oh fuck.

Yeah, it was all a dream.

Reservoir Dogs: The Director’s Cut will be released in January.

SIR EDWIN FLUFFER RECALLS LEE MARVIN

HOLLYWOOD – Sir Edwin Fluffer returns just in time to cast his gimlet eye over the dream factory of Hollywood, turning his attention specifically to War Movies.

There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that war can be an utterly ghastly affair. It really does have a tendency to drag on a bit. That said war movies can be very jolly indeed. I’ve been in more than I care to remember, and would’ve starred in The Dirty Dozen as well if they hadn’t already hired too many actors. I said they should just change the name to The Filthy Thirteen, but the studio wasn’t interested.

War movies are a bit like actual wars really in that ideally you want to end up on the winning side. When you get the script have a flick through, and if you have the line ‘for you my friend ze var iss over’ or anything like that then you’re in trouble. The best thing to do is find someone in the costume department and bung them a few quid in the hope they’ll give you the other team’s uniform. It worked for Gary Cooper in Sergeant York, that’s all I’m saying.

There’s also a fair chance that you’ll have to do a bit of marching. This isn’t as difficult as it sounds as long as you can remember the hokey-cokey! Basically there’s a chap at the front with a moustache, you all line up behind him, and he starts shouting out the moves. When he says ‘left’ you put your left leg in, when he says ‘right’ you put your right leg in, and you just carry on from there really. Burt Lancaster was a lovely marcher, despite his many failings as a human being. His secret was he had not one, but too wooden legs. He’d screw them on, the director would shout ‘action’ and he’d go for miles! The rest of us would have trouble keeping up! It was a great sadness that he got set upon by a family of beavers, ending an otherwise glittering career. To this day I still maintain that he could’ve marched in the Olympics he was that good.

The finest war movie ever made has to be Pearl Harbour, and were Stanley Kubrick alive to have seen it I know he would’ve agreed with me. It was my idea to cast the late Elizabeth Taylor as Pearl, and for my money it was one of her very finest performances. Goodness knows how many hours she had to spend in make up, but it was worth every moment, and with characteristic grace she refused to be credited for the role. We all laughed when she insisted on being paid in bitcoins, then we found out that the fortune she made from that was what funded her fracking operations in the North Atlantic.

But that’s another story…

For more Fluffer please be so good as to CLICK HERE.

 

SIR EDWIN FLUFFER RECALLS HIS INFAMOUS AGENT

HOLLYWOOD- Sir Edwin Fluffer once again delves into his personal memoirs – soon to be published as ‘Not THAT Kind of Fluffer!!!’ – to recall his infamous Theatrical Agent Julius Levy.

Say what you will about Sir Edwin Fluffer, but I am, always have been, and always will be, a man of my word. Occasionally that word may have been slightly misunderstood, but luckily my long suffering agent Julius ‘Gripper’ Levy has forever been on hand to clear up any confusion.
Darling Julius is more than my manager, he’s one of the family. I call him brother, my wonderful children call him Uncle Gripper, and my many ex-wives often call him something quite unpleasant that rhymes with ‘anchor’.
I’ll never forget the first time we met. I’d just fallen into a swimming pool at Gary Cooper’s house, and dear Julius could see the predicament I was in.  As he offered his hand to pull me out of the water he squeezed it tight and said ‘that’s agreed then, I get 15% gross and an Executive Producer credit on all your future pictures’! 
I laughed, but he was deadly serious and I’ve been represented by the old bugger forever since! We’ve had our ups and downs, his arrest for manslaughter after the tragic but entirely accidental death of my gardener being one of the many low points, but our marriage has lasted longer than most in Hollywood. Only once did I ask him how he got that nickname. Gripper looked me straight in the eye, and said just two words: Lee Marvin. 
Neither of us mentioned it ever again. 
For a while he also represented Sabu, the Elephant Boy. By ‘represented’ I mean ‘won in a card game’, but that’s another story…

FLUFFER PREPARES FOR CANNES 2013


It’s getting to that time of year when I dig out my old Panama hat and head over to France, I think it is for the Cannes Film Festival. I missed the first one when a few drinks on the plane with Lee Marvin led to an emergency landing in Norway and a very ugly scene with Interpol, but I’ve been to every one since and have thoroughly enjoyed myself. The only bit I don’t like is the films, which tend to be quite long and very foreign, but they do give you ample time to sleep off the lunch you enjoyed on some producer’s yacht. 

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve done my share of those arty pictures, but you do have to learn to talk in subtitles and the director will have a very irritating beard and insist you take your clothes off. It was at Cannes that Prince Rainier III of Monaco beat me 7-4 at table tennis and celebrated by getting married to Grace Kelly. Sadly I couldn’t attend the wedding because I fell in the sea and ruined my suit, but they always sent a card on my birthday.


It was all years ago now of course, but the other day I heard they’ll be turning that very story into a ‘bio pic’, with dear little Eddy Redmayne as yours truly.  I doubt if anyone’s told him he’ll have to shave his hair off for the scene where Frank Sinatra had me tarred and feathered for cheating at golf, but he’s a very fine actor and I’m sure he’ll cope admirably. 

I do like the bit at the end of the festival when they give out the prizes because it’s a free bar, but you do have to make sure you’re stood upwind of those Eastern European actresses if you know what I mean.  Some of them can look a little startling and I do find their tattoos quite intimidating. 

Lucille Ball showed me her tattoos once, but that’s another story…