M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN: ‘SPLIT IS AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL’

HOLLYWOOD – M. Night Shyamalan admits new movie Split is autobiographical.

Split came out as a surprise success for M. Night Shyamalan. The thriller stars James McAvoy as a man with Disassociative Identity Disorder – commonly referred to as split personality.

The Sixth Sense director today spoke EXCLUSIVELY to the Studio Exec about the real life inspiration for the movie:

When I make a film, I always write what I know. In The Sixth Sense, that was me seeing dead people. After the success of that film, I could do anything. Hence Unbreakable. With Split I looked back over my career and my own split personality. On the one hand, I’m the guy who made Sixth Sense, Signs and Unbreakable. And on the other I’m also the guy who made The Happening, Lady in the Water and The Last Airbender. I realized that there isn’t really one M. Night Shyamalan, but two. The first one I call by my name. The second one prefers to be called Kenny Shitz. In some cases, we’ll actually collaborate on a film. The Village, he did half of and he filmed the last scene of Signs. He did all of The Happening though. He cast Mark Wahlberg.

Is there a chance we can get Kenny under control?

I’d like to say yes. I managed to keep him away from Split for instance. But ultimately who knows? I doubt it.

Split is currently in Cinemas now.

FREE HATS TO BE GIVEN AWAY WITH X-MEN: APOCALYPSE

HOLLYWOOD – Free hats are to be given away at cinemas showing X-Men: Apocalypse, Bryan Singer revealed today.

X-Men: Apocalypse director Bryan Singer revealed that everyone who goes to see his new film X-Men: Apocalypse will be given a free hat. Bryan Singer was speaking EXCLUSIVELY to the Studio Exec following the release of the trailer for the new installment which will star James McAvoy, Nicholas Hoult, Jennifer Lawrence, Oscar Isaac, Sophie Turner and Michael Fassbender as Magneto!

It is really hard for us right now. The Avengers are really out there kicking our asses and then there’s Star Wars and all the spin offs from that to contend with.  There are all these gimmicks as well. IMAX, 3D, IMAX 3D, so I was thinking how can I make the X-Men relevant once more? How can I make it so people want to come and see our movie and not some other movie? And the answer came to me in a dream. Give away free hats.

With every ticket?

Yes, absolutely with every ticket. Once you get your ticket, you get the free hat. I’ve designed them personally. They’ll be top hats and they’ll have writing across them. One will say ‘I went to see the X-Men: Apocalypse and Loved It’ and the other will say ‘The X-Men Rock (Not As Much As The Avengers, But Still)’. The idea is that people will go and see our film and when they come out wearing their hats, it’ll be advertising for our movie. Isn’t that wonderful?

And these are top hats?

Yes.

Well, won’t they block the view? I mean if everyone gets a top hat and puts it on during the film, the people behind won’t be able to see.

The don’t have to… why would they…

You could have bowler hats.

We’ve already bought the top hats. We’ve already made them. Hundreds of thousands of top hats. Half of them saying ‘I went to see the X-Men: Apocalypse and Loved It’ and the other half saying ‘The X-Men Rock (Not As Much As The Avengers, But Still)’.

Didn’t that cost a lot of money?

Half our budget.

This is a really…

Shut up.

X-Men: Apocalypse will be released on May 26th, 2016.

NEW FRANKENSTEIN MOVIE ABOUT FRANKENSTEIN NOT REALLY FRANKENSTEIN

HOLLYWOOD – The new Frankenstein movie Victor Frankenstein isn’t really Frankenstein.

Paul Muigan’s new take on the Mary Shelley classic Victor Frankenstein isn’t actually Frankenstein but purports to tell the story of the secret story behind Frankenstein. Victor Frankenstein is played by James McAvoy who is most famous for playing Mr. Tumnus in the Narnia films. He spoke EXCLUSIVELY to the Studio Exec about the film:

You see the thing about Frankenstein by Mary Shelley is that there are a lot of words and these words are organised into sentences and they just go on and on for over two hundred pages, and we thought wouldn’t it be better if we just took the names and then added a few others and then went at it like that. I mean who wants Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein. You’d have to be an idiot to want Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein.

Kenneth Branagh did Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein.

Yeah, but it wasn’t really Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein, was it?

He actually called it Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein. 

That I did not know. Okay. Well, there you go. It’s been done to death hasn’t it. And then James Whales did the classic version of Frankenstein and we can’t really compete with that. Then Mel Brooks did the best comedy Frankenstein in Young Frankenstein, so we don’t want to go that far. So we decided to do the shittest Frankenstein.

Well done. I think you’ve achieved your aim.

Thank you very much.

How was it working with Daniel Radcliffe?

Who?

Harry Potter.

Oh it was fantastic. You see he knows all about magic, he does card tricks, pulls handkerchiefs out of your ear, the whole thing. So as you know filming can be very dull, and Harry would always entertain the ‘muggles’ as he calls them.

Victor Frankenstein is in the cinema.

JAMES MCAVOY CONFIRMS MR. TUMNUS SPIN OFF

NARNIA – Fans of The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe were racked by multiple geekgasms today, when it was announced that James McAvoy would be returning to the pan pipes for Narnia spin off Mr. Tumnus Takes a Packet of Tea.

Many believed they had seen the last of the half naked, tea making and pipe playing fawn, but apparently world-wide demand could not be nay-sayed. On speaking to the Studio Exec earlier today, the Scottish actor who recently excelled in Filth seemed less than whole-heartedly enthusiastic.

Two words. Fer-uck. Have’ney seen enough of that irritating wee shite? 

So you’re not looking forward to …

Am i not looking forward to frezing me wee nipples off? Nay I’m not. And for what? A children’s film! I cannae do it, not again.

So why are you doing it?

They pay well and they’ve said I can rewrite the script.

Oh really? 

I’m gonna insist in my contract. Page one. Scene One. Mr. Tumnus knits a f*cking jumper. And he’s gonna be edgier too. He’s gonna snort cocaine and hang with some dirty beavers.

You mean the Mr. and Mrs. Beaver, voiced by the wonderful talent Dawn French and Ray Winstone?

No. I mean beavers. And I’m changing the title.

Mr. Tumnus Enters the Void will be released in 2016.