FURY AS DUKES OF HAZZARD REMAKE TO BE HETEROSEXUAL

HOLLYWOOD – Following on from the news that NBC plan to make a gay centered version of “Hart to Hart”, it was revealed today that “Dukes of Hazzard” would also have its sexuality realigned this time making it into a heterosexual show!

The Dukes of Hazzard has long been praised as a pioneer in its portrayal of genteel Southern hospitality, gay sexuality and inter-cousin relationships.  In its original run from 1979 to 1985, the Bo (Tom Wopat) and Luke Duke (John Schnieder) were husband and husband, who with their cousin Daisy (Catherine Bach), good-naturedly fought the ingrained bigotry of the South as represented by Boss Hogg and his fascist police force, ironically re-appropriating the Confederate flag as an image of their rebellion. The Waylon Jennings theme song ‘Good Ol’ Boys’ was a heartfelt plea for tolerance: ‘Making their way, They only way they know how// Which is a little more, than the law will allow’.

In the new version, Bo and Luke will be brothers and they will concentrate less on loving each other and more on being racist. An insider working on the remake told the Studio Exec:

Everyone was very disappointed with the movie that was made. First of all there was the complete change of the homosexuality and then their was that ass-wipe Johnny Knoxville. I’ve not met one single person who likes that guy. Anyway, when we came to look at the idea of reviving the show we decided that we could perhaps continue with the heterosexuality and move into racism as well. What with the Duke Dynasty fellows and Paula Deen, not to mention our next president Donald Trump, there’s a buck in this racism lark!

However, many fans are furious at the proposed changes. One Dukes of Hazzard blogger, HazzardCountyPop23 wrote:

The sexual frisson was what made the show. Take that away and make them brothers and you might as well set it in Kentucky!

It should also be noted that this new version has nothing to do with the cancelled Bill Cosby show that was planned earlier this year (CLICK HERE for that story).

The Dukes of Hazzard Ride Again will be broadcast next year.

HART TO HART TO GET GAY REMAKE

HOLLYWOOD – NBC has announced that they are in the process of developing a gay remake of popular detective show Hart to Hart.

A source close to the Hart to Hart production spoke EXCLUSIVELY to the Studio Exec:

In this new era of marriage equality it is only a matter of time before we start seeing a whole raft of shows featuring same sex couples. In the new show Jonathan and Daniel Hartman, self-made millionaire and his trophy husband will solve a whole series of murders and crimes helped by their faithful manservant Maxine the Butler and their dog Freeway.

The original show featured Robert Wagner, Stephanie Powers and Lionel Stander and speculation is rife as to who will play the leads, but the money is on the renewed pairing of Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman with Lady Gaga in the role of Maxine. Rumors that Freeway will be a Chihuahua have been strongly denied.

There is a good chance that the new Hart to Hart will be only the first in a whole raft of remakes realigned to mirror changes in the acceptance and celebration of our diverse sexuality. Rumors are already circulating of a lesbian Cagney and Lacey, an aggressively gay Manimal and a completely heterosexual Dukes of Hazzard.

Hart to Hart is due for broadcast in 2017.