MICHAEL HANEKE TO REMAKE THE ACCUSED

VIENNA – Acclaimed film director Michael Haneke is to remake the 80s rape drama The Accused.

The 1988 drama The Accused starred Jodie Foster and Kelly McGillis as a rape victim and her lawyer, revealing that the justice system was skewed in the favor of rapists rather than their accusers. In the wake of the Harvey Weinstein scandal and the #MeToo movement, Funny Games and The White Ribbon director, Michael Haneke has decided to remake Jonathan Kaplan’s movie.

He spoke EXCLUSIVELY with the Studio Exec:

It is a movie that has interested me for a long time. I always told my producers if I was to ever remake an American movie it would either be The Cannonball Run 2 or The Accused. michael haneke

Will this be a shot for shot remake like with Funny Games US?

No. In that case the film was mine and so the original was perfect and all I had to do was recreate it faithfully but in English and I knew it would be perfect. And it was. But The Accused has a lot wrong with it and I will need to perfect it with my frosty genius.

Your frosty…

Genius, yes. I’m not afraid of the word.

How have you changed it?

To begin with, in the original the title was supposed to be ironic. The victim is revealed to be the person who is ‘accused’ by the justice system and society at large. In my new film, this irony is removed. I want to focus on the men and how they have been persecuted and hounded, I delve into their lives and for the first time in the history of cinema, show things from the male point of view.

The Accused is in theatres in 2020.

BEN AFFLECK TIPS MICHAEL HANEKE TO TAKE OVER AS DIRECTOR ON THE BATMAN

HOLLYWOOD – Ben Affleck has recommended Michael Haneke to take over as director of The Batman.

As Ben Affleck steps down from The Batman, the star who will still act and co-producer has some firm ideas about his replacement. ‘I think they should get Michael Haneke,’ he told the Studio Exec in an EXCLUSIVE interview:

First, I’ve always loved Michael’s work from The Seventh Continent to The White Ribbon. I think tonally he is a perfect fit for The Batman. And with Funny Games US he’s already shown he can direct in English michael hanekelanguage movies.

But isn’t Batman a more action-oriented picture?

Traditionally yes. But what separates it from other superhero pics is the tone. And Haneke really has that tone. I talked to him a lot about this. I found out he’s actually a huge fan of the DC universe.

And you’re a big fan of his?

Yeah. You know when that Sadfleck gif was going around? Well, that was partly because I’d watched a lot of his movies. A Haneke marathon kind of leaves you like that.

What do you think Will Michael Haneke’s The Batman be a movie you want to see? Comment below.

HANEKE AND FARRELLY BROTHERS COLLABORATE ON FUNNIER GAMES

AUSTRIA – Famed Austrian auteur and misery Michael Haneke is to team up with some of the legends of American gross out comedy to remake Funny Games for the second time.

Having won the Palmes D’Or and the Oscars for his film Amour, Michael Haneke is considered by many to be at the top of his art house game. And so yesterday’s announcement came out of the blue, as – in a joint press conference with Pete and Bobby Farrelly, he announced a sequel to his only American made film, Funny Games, provisionally entitled Funnier Games.

The 2007 film which featured Naomi Watts and Tim Roth being terrorized by Michael Pitt and chum in white tennis toggs was something of a misstep for the director and he has since gone on record regretting the film, which was a remake of a film he had already made in German in 1997. The idea for a sequel came when the director saw the film again in a small Los Angeles theater.

Haneke recalled:

There was this raucous laughter coming from the back all the way through the film, and I thought how wonderful, finally someone who understands my admittedly bleak Austrian sense of humor.  After the film I followed the men who had been laughing and cornered them at the McDonald’s where they were drinking out of one soda carton with two straws.

‘We thought Mikey’s work was unbelievable, like totally,’ says Bobby.

‘Misunderstood,’ says Petey. ”The Seventh Continent? Hilarious. Hour of the Wolf? Hilarious. The White Ribbon? I pissed my pants it was so funny.’

‘He totally did,’ says Bobby. ‘He pissed his pants.’

The new film will feature Adam Sandler and Jim Carrey, killing children amidst hapless escapades and gross out humor.

‘He really did piss his pants,’ Bobby assured us. Again.

Funny Games will be released in 2017.

MICHAEL HANEKE EYES LEGO MOVIE 2

HOLLYWOOD – He said he’d never do it, but Austrian film director Michael Haneke is considering taking the helm of The Lego Movie 2.

Phil Lord and Chris Miller spoke about the Funny Games and White Ribbon director’s involvement with The Lego Movie 2 and his involvement with their previous projects:

Michael likes to keep the worlds seperate, but in truth he has been a part of our creative team since the very beginning. He is fascinated by the duality of life. On one side you have the brutality of existence and on the other the hopelessness of existence. We first met him when we were young film students and he was making Funny Games (US). We had a script for Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs and he very generously read it and gave us some notes.

What were the notes?

He said that the main character, Flint Lockwood, should die at the end. And Sam Sparks should die. And Flint’s dad should die. Everybody should die basically and food should take over the world. We obviously decided to go in another direction, but he encouraged us to work harder for the comedy.

How will he be involved in The Lego Movie 2?

Michael basically wrote the first two drafts of the first film. The whole subversion of capitalism thing was him. Very few people know this, but Michael also wrote the lyrics to Everything is Awesome, which when you think about it is awesome. Naturally we went to him for ideas on the sequel and jokingly asked if he would be interested in directing it. At first he was unsure because he is also scripting 23 Jump Street and he’s wrapping up production of the Amour sequel, but we are very hopeful he is going to say yes.

How will The Lego Movie 2 be different with Michael Haneke directing?

I’m not sure it’ll be darker. After all, Michael likes to defy expectations, but the script is in and we’re really looking forward to seeing what he can do.

The Lego Movie 2: Extinction will be filming in 2016.

REMAKE WATCH: ACTION JACKSON


VIENNA – In one of the most intriguing pairings of this year, Denzel Washington and Michael Haneke will be joining forces to remake the 1988 Carl Weathers vehicle Action Jackson.


Washington said he was looking forward to working with the Austrian auteur:

He may not be the most joyful person to be around, but I’m being paid a ton of cash so I can handle that.

White Ribbon director has previously mentioned Action Jackson as a major influence on his own work:

In Funny Games I was making a statement about how audiences enjoy the violence in their movies, and this is a similar idea that I want to express here. I want to punish the appetite for violence and remakes. If audiences want an awful remake then I’m going to give them a really bad truly awful terrible terrible remake. 

The ‘Funnyman of Vienna’ – as his student at the Vienna Film Academy are forced to call him – also said: “I felt that the little boy in Funny Games got it easy last time, so the children will really suffer in Action Jackson.”


Joel Silver, who produced the original and will oversee the new ‘imagining’, commented on Haneke’s ideas for the film:

He can do whatever he likes with it, as long as I get my god-damned helicopter shot. Audiences will lap up whatever we have to offer, but like I said, if I don’t get the chopper in there, I’ll give him a statement, and that statement will be my cigar in his eye.


Action Jackson will be released in 2014.

THE HANEKE AMUSEMENT PARK OPENS IN VIENNA

VIENNA – Having won the Oscar and golden Palme d’or for his French remake of Meet the Fockers, Michael Haneke is branching out into other fields of entertainment, opening an amusement park in the suburbs of Vienna based on his filmography.

Haneke Land looks set to rival Euro-Disney and Lego Land as the most popular European destination to take the kids for a fun day out.

As Haneke showed us around the site, the Austrian director and famous misery guts said he was ‘stoked’  about the project.
All my films are represented. For instance, the mini-golf is called Funny Games and you have to break a smug middle class man’s leg. In the Seventh ContinentFamily Trip, you go through a car wash into the ride then you destroy everything you own and commit suicide. It’s fantastic!
The White Ribbon of Fun anticipates the cruelty and horror of the Second World War via childhood sadism. ‘It’s like a merry-go-round but the horses all trip up and have to be humanely destroyed,’  says Mike.
There’s also the Piano Teacher Hall of Mirrors, Benny’s Video-rama and the Hidden Experience during which someone you bullied when you were kids cuts his throat in front of you and your family.

Haneke Land is due to open in the first week of May and the first 90 customers will receive a complementary punch in the throat.

5 FACTS YOU NEVER KNEW ABOUT NAOMI WATTS

HOLLYWOOD – How many myths? How many lies? How much mumbo jumbo has surrounded the most enigmatic of Norwegians, Naomi Watts?

Well no longer! Studio Exec – armed with the baloney busting Bazooka of brilliance – puts paid to piffle with FACT.

  1. Naomi Watts’ father Jeff Watts invented electricity. 
  2. In preparation for the filming of Tsunami drama The Impossible Watts and her co-star Fr. Ewan MacGregor learnt to speak fluent Spanish, had their hair dyed and even applied for Spanish citizenship so as to reproduce the experiences of the real life Belòn family with the appropriate verisimilitude. ‘It would be a disgusting insult to Maria Belòn and her family to just Anglicize the characters in order to make the film more commercially successful,’ said Ms. Watts. However, the studio dubbed the film into English and changed the family into an English family, at which point Ms. Watts forgot Spanish instantly.
  3. As well as being a versatile actress, Naomi Watts is also an expert linguist. Her mastery of accents is such that people rarely guess she is Norwegian. She adopts a light Australian accent during interviews which provoked criticism from the Norwegian Prime Minister Jens Stoltenberg, who took to referring to Naomi Watts as Naomi Whats?, which is considered hilarious in Norway and was instrumental to his winning of the election.
  4. Her early film roles included a supporting role in Tank Girl and Norwegian soap opera Home and Away. Naomi Watts also appeared in King Kong, although at the last minute the roles were changed and Andy Serkis played the large eponymous monkey. 
  5. During the filming of David Lynch’s masterly Mulholland Drive, Ms. Watts prepared for her part by eating nothing but squirrel in the mistaken belief it would help her attune to Mr. Lynch’s precise brand of weirdness.  She used the same technique when starring in the American language version of Funny Games, during which she only ate Michael Haneke’s favourite type of Pot Noodle. 
For more FACTS on everything from this to that click HERE! 

AMOUR FAILS TO PICK UP ANY NOMINATIONS AT THE NEW YORK COMEDY AWARDS

NEW YORK – Austrian film maker Michael Haneke’s austere masterpiece Amour has been picking up nominations and awards every since it premièred at Cannes earlier this year and won the coveted Palme d’Or. But there is one award it won’t be getting: Best Comedy Film 2012.
The story of an elderly couple facing up to their own mortality and disintegration with dignity and stoicism was deemed ‘Just not funny enough’ by Alvin Mayers the chief judge of the Comedy Awards, hosted at the BinBin Club Times Square, NYC.

There was one scene with like a pigeon that had some potential but it just didn’t come off. I’m not saying Haneke needs to go gross out, but come on man, make a goddam effort. 

When Studio Exec  met up with his glumness earlier today, Michael Haneke said ‘It was typical’ and shook his head miserably:

I’ve been trying for years. I mean Funny Games I made twice because I thought they’d missed the joke the first time around as I’d stupidly made it in German. But alas, nothing. Everything is just falling apart and miserable and we die. We all die. Not now but later. Even that is depressing. We don’t die now. We have to wait.

Now with the competition effectively eliminated, the field looks clear for Here Comes the Boom to make a clean sweep.