MEGYN KELLY LINES UP JABBA THE HUTT

HOLLYWOOD – NBC host Megyn Kelly will interview Jabba the Hutt on Sunday, causing yet more controversy.

Megyn Kelly has moved from Fox to NBC but it looks like the Fox News sensationalism has moved with her. First she softballs Vladimir Putin and then gives conspiracy theorist, truther and performance artist Alex Jones a platform. However, her latest interview is set to cause even more controversy. Next Sunday, Megyn will be interviewing Tatooine gangster Jabba Desilijic Tiure more commonly known of as Jabba the Hutt.

Kelly spoke to Studio Exec EXCLUSIVELY to the Studio Exec:

The fact is Jabba is a powerful force in the galaxy and it is time that we examined the views, as abhorrent as those views might be to some people. Do I agree with what he says? No. Do I support the slavery and scriminal activity he is accused of? Of course not. Do I like having to wear that strange Princess Leia bikini as a precondition to agreeing to the interview? I’d rather not. But if that’s what it takes to get the ratings… I mean story, then that’s a price I’m willing to pay. It’s not nice, but then again I worked for Roger Ailes so I think I’m prepared.

However, victims of the Hutts represented by the Sarlac Truth Society roundly condemned NBC:

Jabba the Hutt has destroyed literally thousands of lives, many of them being digested in a slow horrible death in the Pit of Carkoon or killed by the Rancor. The fact that he will be given a prime time audience on national television is an insult to all those who have died.

When called on to respond NBC issued a one word statement:

RATINGS.

Megyn Kelly Meets Jabba will air this Sunday on NBC. Image courtesy of @ThePixelFactor.

JON STEWART JOINS FOX & FRIENDS

NEW YORK – Following his departure at The Daily Show, host Jon Stewart has revealed that he will be joining the popular Fox News show Fox & Friends.

Speculation ran rife about Jon Stewart’s future plans when the popular comedian announced that he was leaving The Daily Show. The smart money was on a new career as a film director following the critical success of his debut film “Rosewater.” And so it came as a shock to many in the liberal media establishment when it was revealed today that Jon will be joining the popular morning show Fox & Friends. He explained EXCLUSIVELY to the Studio Exec:

I am someone who enjoys challenges and change. As host of The Daily Show, I am always surrounded by intelligent people who really care about what they are doing. So I wondered to myself—What would it be like working with a bunch of callous hacks? That’s when I got the offer from Fox. Originally the idea was to cohost a show with Bill O’Reilly, but Bill put his foot down because he gets nervous around intelligence.

Jon’s new colleagues say they are delighted to have him on board. Elisabeth Hasselbeck, Steve Doocy and Brian Kilmeade spoke in robotic unison to the Studio Exec:

We are delighted to have Stewart join us on the Fox couch. As watching other channels is illegal for Fox employees, we’ve heard through the grapevine that some of his work is popular with people, and we are the people’s network, so we should all get along just fine. He’ll have to go easy on the factual stuff and the thinking-about-things habit, but other than that we think he’ll really enjoy our cooking segments and introducing our popular music guests like Pat Benatar.

In related news, incoming host Trevor Noah tweeted that ‘Jewish women are ugly #jk’.

Fox & Friends with Jon Stewart will begin broadcasting in the next few weeks.

Image courtesy of @ThePixelFactor