CHUCK NORRIS TO REMAKE DEAD POETS SOCIETY

HOLLYWOOD – Chuck Norris is to remake Dead Poets Society in the first movie to come out of the NRA Films Studio.

Action star Chuck Norris is to enter the classroom as John Keating in a remake of Dead Poets Society. Norris will take over the role of the inspirational teacher who was originally brought to life by Robin Williams in one of his finest performances. Chuck spoke EXCLUSIVELY with the Studio Exec about the role:

I love the movie and I think it is a classic. But is it perfect? No.

What do you intend to change?

Well, the first film is very much of its time. We’ll be updating it quite radically.

In what way?

In the first film, Robin inspired his students with a love of poetry and encouraged them to express their individuality and even rebel agaisnt the strictures of their time and the prejudices of their parents. In our version, I’ll be machine going sick psychos who are attacking the school in the name of the Black Lives Matter activists.

Wait, what?

And the iconic scene where they say ‘My Captain, My Captain’. That never made sense to me.

It was quote from Walt…

So I’m actually going to be a Delta Force Captain. See? Better already. Oh and we’re not reading poetry anymore.

No?

We’re just defending the school against waves and waves of Islamic terrorists.

Dead Poets Society: Mission to Damascus will be released in 2019.

47 FILMS: 37. THE CARS THAT ATE PARIS

In our continuing series of  ’47 Films to see before you’re murdered in your dreams’, we look at Peter Weir’s debut feature film The Cars that Ate Paris.

One of the many, many joys of Mad Max: Fury Road was the appearance of the porcupine spiky cars that turned up early in the chase scene. An obvious nod to compatriot Peter Weir’s debut comedy/horror The Cars that Ate Paris which featured a VW Beetle that looked like Herbie’s bad-ass bastard brother.

The story of the film reads like a  Twilight Zone episode penned by J. G. Ballard. Paris is a pleasant pastoral town in rural Australia with more than a passing resemblance to Hobbiton, but it hides an awful secret. The town folk engineer car accidents which they then profit from. Arthur Waldo (Terry Camilleri) and his older brother, George Waldo (Rick Scully) are two such victims when they crash near the town with their caravan. Survivors of the crashes are usually lobotomized by the town surgeon with power drills, but Arthur is spared and befriended by the Mayor of Paris, Len Kelly (John Meillon). The young men of the town use the spare parts to soup up and weaponize their own vehicles, becoming increasingly resistant to the authority of their elders. Weir’s brilliant twist is to never quite reveal who is the most dangerous. Are the hooligans in their cars really more dangerous than the elders who have clinically set up a murderous cottage industry while still maintaining a parody of gentility in their daily lives?

Weir’s film is darkly funny, but never commits fully to the silliness of its B-movie Oz-ploitation origins. Death Race 2000 retooled the same model in a much more exuberant manner. Weir would progress to the wonders of Picnic at Hanging Rock and Gallipoli, and later Hollywood fame with Witness, Dead Poets Society, Master and Commander and The Truman Show. But already with The Cars that Ate Paris, the topic of a closed world with its own strict rules is there, and will fascinate the Australian director for years to come.

For more of our 47 Films to see Before you are Murdered in your Dreams’ Click Here.