CRIMSON PEAK – REVIEW

CRIMSON PEAK – REVIEW – Loki and Alice in Wonderland get together and go to Tim Burton’s Winter residence in the company of the chick who smoked Bin Laden.

Mexican director, Giullermo Del Toro has had the ‘roller-coaster’ type career with financial and critical highs HellBoy and Pan’s Labyrinth as well as the odd misfire and the protracted disaster of his involvement with The Hobbit movies. Back with regular collaborator Matthew Robbins, Crimson Peak is gore-geous pastiche, a finely wrought and beautifully transcribed love letter to an eclectic bunch of horror influences, written in deep red calligraphy. The Shining Fall of the Hammer House of H.P. Lovecraft, if you will. And you must.

Mia Wasikowska plays Edith Cushing – her name an immediate call back to Hammer regular and Grand Moff Tarkin Peter Cushing – a wealthy young woman with literary aspirations who is doted on by her bootstraps wealthy father (Jim Beaver). When a visiting Baronet Sir Thomas Sharpe (Tom Hiddleston) comes in search of investment for his mining project, he is rebuffed by the father but despite her initial suspicion of aristocracy, Edith is won over by the handsome stranger who makes the sharp move of praising her writing. Events occur and Edith finds herself whisked away by her new husband to Cumberland in the North of England and a crumbling pile that sits atop a clay mine that stains the snow red and gives the film its title. ensconced with Tom and his mysterious sister Lucille (Jessica Chastain) – a reference to the Dolly Parton song… no wait maybe I’m getting carried away – Edith is haunted by ghosts and begins to believe that her life might be in danger as the snow falls through holes in the roof, herbal tea makes her increasingly drowsy and her fortune is signed over to her husband to finance his clay mining in the garden.

Crimson Peak demands that you are engulfed by the sheer visual luxuriousness of its shots, the fluid camera movements, the sumptuously detailed sets, the richly embroidered costumes and the elfin beauty of its actors. We are tangled in a web of references – Mary Shelley and Arthur Conan Doyle are name checked and a ball rolls from the corridors of the Overlook Hotel to the landing of the Sharpe family mansion – and yet at the same time this is pastiche, not parody, and everyone plays their parts with utmost seriousness: Chastain and Hiddleston are particularly riveting. And for all the cleverness on display and sharp wit, Del Toro is not afraid of a little essential stupidity. Edith sleep walks into her situation, having been warned by her dead mother on several occasions, and those around her including the young opthalmicist Dr. McMichael (Charlie Hunnam) seem almost wilfully blind to the machinations of the Sharpes and Hunnam has two long reaction shots of looking puzzled while viewing something incredibly obvious in its suspiciousness. But none of this really matters, or perhaps, more accurately, is part of the genre. This kind of horror is not based on shock revelations or surprise twists but ratehr the dawning realization of what you always knew, succumbing to the fate that was always there before you, as the old house of dark history breathes around you and slowly sinks into the blood red mud.

Crimson Peak is a deliciously dreamy tale of macabre horror.

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SCRIPT LEAK: FIFTY SHADES OF GREY

INT: BEDROOM

 

Christian Grey

Can you just…

 

Anastasia

Is that better?

 

Christian Grey 

Much better.

  

Anastasia 

Don’t you want to put it there?

 

Christian Grey

Do you want me to put it there?

 

Anastasia

No. I’m scared what will happen if you put it there.

 

Christian Grey

I want you to be scared.

 

Anastasia 

Put it there then.

 

Christian

Beg me to put it there.

 

Anastasia

Please will you put it there.

 

Christian

Say please will you put it there, Sir!

 

Anastasia

Please will you put it there, Sir.

 

Christian

I’m going to take you now.

 

Anastasia

Take me.

 

Christian

Louder.

 

Anastasia

Take me!

 

Christian 

Louder!

 

Anastasia

 

TAKE ME SIR. FOR GOD SAKE TAKE ME!

 

Christian

Ok fine. Knight to King 4. Knight takes Queen. Check.

 

Anastasia 

Your Bishop is exposed.

 

Christian

Yeah sorry about that. It’s these tight trousers.

 

 

FIN  

 

MAX VON SYDOW IS CHRISTIAN GREY IN 50 SHADES OF GREY

HOLLYWOOD  – The wait is over; the fervid rumors can cease: finally, the film makers turning E.L. James’ erotic literary masterpiece Fifty Shades of Grey have found their Charlie Hunnam replacement and lead: Max Von Sydow.

‘We thought Shia LaBeouf and Ryan Gosling at first and then we thought, maybe Robert Pattinson, but in the end we decided to go with an actor,’ says producer, Hamish McRse. ‘And name me a better actor than famed Swedish thespian Max Von Sydow.’


Von Sydow – or Jesus the Merciless as he prefers to be known – said that he was delighted to have landed the role:

I’ve read the book a number of times and it is very racy, but I’ve talked to my doctors and they say that as long as I get plenty of rest the night before I should be up for it. I will of course follow the example of the great Shia LaBeouf and insist on doing it for real.

 As yet no name has been announced for Anastasia Steele, the young student who is swept up in Christian (Sydow) sadomasochistic sex dominance games sex, although Emma Watson and Jennifer Lawrence have both been rumoured. More on this story as it breaks.

CORRECTION: in an earlier post it was mentioned that Rutger Hauer would be playing the role but that was an error and – as many of you pointed out – plainly ridiculous, he’s much too young.

50 Shades of Grey is due in cinemas sometime in 2014.

REVEALED WHY CHARLIE HUNNAM LEFT 50 SHADES


HOLLYWOOD – The world has been reeling since news broke over the weekend that Pacific Rim star Charlie Hunnam would not be playing Christian Grey in the movie version of the E.L. James S&M porn fest that is 50 Shades of Grey. Focus Features released a statement exclusively to the Studio Exec detailing the behind the scenes drama which led up to the Hunnam exit as it is being called.  

Everything was set for production, but there were still unresolved issues as to certain creative decisions yet to be made, and Charlie, who is a very talented actor, on learning some of the original impulses that were driving the source material decided on long reflection that this would not be a project that he would be able to devote the passion to that would be necessary for a successful realization of the director’s and the author’s original vision. 

Charlie Hunnam gave a shorter statement. 

I read the book.

50 Shades of Grey will begin shooting with Max Von Sydow in the lead.