EXPERTS WARN 2018 WILL BE A FORCE 4 KEIRA KNIGHTLEY YEAR

HOLLYWOOD – Keira Knightley will return in 2018, experts warn. And she will be more powerful than ever.

Batten down the hatches.  2017 held some shocks for us, but experts today issued a warning that 2018 will bring with it a definite force 4 Keira Knightley. Knightley watcher and expert Domino Hatch told the Studio Exec:

Not since A Dangerous Method have we had so much Knightley on the horizon. She will be at Sundance with Colette. Later in the year, The Aftermath is expected. And then she’s also appearing in Berlin, I Love You and Disney fantasy The Nutcracker and the Four Realms. It’s terrifying.

How can people prepare?

The problem this year is we’ve been relatively Knightley free for some time. So we might not think we need to take precautions. People are dense that way. What I would do is just show the family a bit of Love, Actually or a couple of scenes from Bend it Like Beckham. That way the shock won’t be so extreme.

Is Knightley’s return linked to global warming?

There are some good studies that seem to suggest a link but so far nothing conclusive. I don’t want to muddy the waters by getting into all that.

Colette will be released in 2018.

TOP 5 SOCCER FILMS

BRAZIL – In honor of the World Cup Studio Exec has taken time out of his busy schedule to use his top 5 Soccer Films. 

1. Escape to Victory – It has Pele, Michael Caine and Sylvester Stallone as a goal keeper. Directed by John Huston and co-starring Max Von Sydow it’s actually better than soccer itself and proves decisively that Soccer won the war and not tennis as the French insist.

2. Kes – Not really about football but there’s a great football match in the middle with a superlative Brian Glover. See also Gregory’s Girl

3. Zidane – A documentary about everyone’s favorite headbutter of Italians.

4. Bend it Like Beckham – On the one hand it was a popular light comedy about a young British girl’s ambition to play football despite her traditional Indian family’s protests. On the other, it introduced us to the talents of Kiera Knightley.  

5. The Damned United – Michael Sheen plays Brian Clough, a football manager of something called Leeds United Football Club (a fictional team?) who seems hell bent on pissing everybody off, to hilarious results. 

For more lists of things with the number 5 in the title Click Here.