HOLLYWOOD – Veteran rocker and Genesis front man Phil Collins today confessed that he was the voice behind Emma Watson’s Belle in the new live action Beauty and the Beast.

British rocker Phil Collins admits to being the voice behind Emma Watson in Disney’s new Beauty and the Beast. He spoke with the Studio Exec EXCLUSIVELY:

I’m thoroughly ashamed of myself. But the divorce lawyers took a real bite and I need the moolah. First they came sniffing around the time of La La Land. Just a little bit of vocals, Phil, they said. Three days tops. So I said yes.

This was for Ryan Gosling’s role?phil collins

No, Emma Stone. She’s a beautiful lady and she’s got a pair of pegs on her. But Lord her singing voice was like someone bunging a cat locked in a fridge down a spiral staircase. Lorks!

So you dubbed Emma Stone in La La Land?


She won an Oscar for that role.

Did she? I don’t keep up with the showbiz. It depresses me frankly.

Then you got the Beauty and the Beast gig?

Yeah. They liked what I’d done so they must have thought, Phil’s the go-to guy to voice Emmas.  It was a bit harder, but I managed. Hermione had given it her best shot bless her. But her best shot sounded roughly the equivalent of someone killing a bucket of baby seals with a claw-headed hammer.

Not good.

Someone called 911. And it was someone in the studio who knew what was happening.

So you came in.

Yeah. And I gargled with pineapple juice and away I went.

Pineapple juice?

Yeah. It makes me sound less like a dustbin man and more like a young scrap of a lass.

What’s your next project?

Emily Blunt. Oh and I’m doing a charity record for the victims of drone attacks.

What’s it called?

I can Feel it Coming in the Air Tonight (Oh Lord).

Beauty and the Beast is in cinemas.


HOLLYWOOD – So Emma Watson is a feminist and has boobs!? And….?

Knives were out for Emma Watson this week following a photo shoot for Vanity Fair showed and under bit and some side boob, confirming that the former Hermione Granger has boobs. This wouldn’t have been deemed in anyway controversial, except that Watson CLAIMS to be a feminist! Yeah, that’s right a feminist with boobs. Unbelievable. Oh and by the way, I once met renowned socialist Noam Chomsky and get this: he was wearing shoes! It was unbelievable. All his bullshit about manufacturing consent and the US policy of dominance in the world, calling himself a progressive and yet walking around in a pair of shoes. What the fuck, right?

Oh but I guess the idea is that if Watson is a feminist she must be like a puritan of some kind who objects to the objectification of the female body. Is that it? Well, that’s one argument in one kind of feminism, I guess. But not all feminists accept it. The basic definition is that feminist believe that women should have legal, social and political equality, the same freedoms as men take for granted. So the most important idea is that of choice and freedom to exercise those choices. The freedom to reclaim their own bodies as well, if need be.

This non-argument is the last thrash of saddoes who can’t handle women exercising their freedom. This is the Ford model of liberation: you’re free to do whatever you want as long as it conforms to what I think you should do. You can say whatever you like as long as it doesn’t upset me. You can call yourself a feminist, a word most critics don’t even understand the basic definition of, as long as then you behave to my own misapprehension of what the word means.

Fact of the matter is Emma Watson has grown up. It’s time we did too.