HOLLYWOOD – Avengers: Endgame is almost upon us so what do you need to know?
As tickets for Avengers: Endgame go on sale, here are five FACTS for you to MARVEL at.
1 Iron Man will be played by Chris Evans and Robert Downey Jr will play Captain America, because they are bored.
2 The Hulk will get angry at a decisive moment.
3 Stan Lee’s body will make a cameo – Weekend at Bernie’s style.
4 Captain Marvel will be amazing. The ending won’t be anywhere near as good as the ending of Infinity War. Many of the surprises you already know, so they’ll kill off someone unexpectedly/expectedly in the first five minutes so you’ll lose your shit.
5 You’ll be humming the score for a couple of seconds and then completely forget it.
HOLLYWOOD – Directors of the Avengers: Infinity War Anthony and Joseph Russo are not actually brothers.
Hollywood reeled yesterday at the news that the Russo Brothers are not actually brothers. The revelation broke early this morning.
A source close to the ‘brothers’ said:
Anthony Russo’s name is actually Michael Palace and Joseph Russo is called Peter Blinks. They decided from an early age that they should work together as brothers when as a matter of fact they were not.
Joseph Russo popped by the Studio Exec bungalow to explain. He was crying.
We didn’t mean no harm. We just saw the Coen Brothers doing so well and then the Wachowski siblings and even the Duplass Brothers. We thought: why not be brothers? It was all going according to plan until some asshole at Vanity Fair wanted to interview our ‘mother’.
Anthony Russo chipped in:
It was a great idea and no one can say it wasn’t. But it doesn’t matter anymore. After this last Avengers film we’re done. We’re not going to do anymore films together.
Avengers Infinity War is on release.
HOLLYWOOD – Marvel announced there will not be a sequel to Avengers Inifinity War.
This is the end, Jim Morrison famously sang and so have Marvel. Avengers Infinity War will be the last Avengers film, it has been decided. A source close to the studio spoke EXCLUSIVELY with the Studio Exec today:
There was an idea to continue the story. Originally, we envisioned this as part one of a two-parter, but increasingly as we watched people lose their shit we realized, you know what, we’re good.
So that means…
But what about…
No, we’re canceling them.
I know. And you know the beautiful thing is that even now DC won’t be able to come up with anything to compete.
Avengers: Thanos is Struck Back At will not be released in 2019.