HOLLYWOOD – In what is sure to be a massively popular move, Paul W.S. Anderson director of such classics as Aliens Vs. Predators, Resident Evil and The Master has announced his next project: an Ender’s Game, Hunger Games, Game of Thrones mash-up to be entitled Ender’s Hunger Games of Thrones.
I am a huge fan of all these films, books TV shows … erm, products? Anyway, I always wondered what would happen if you take these things and put them all together. Can you imagine all the money, I mean the possibilities to such an idea.
The official synopsis reads:
Katniss Everdeen (Jennifer Lawrence, or someone who looks a bit like her) having won another Hunger Game and got bored is recruited by Colonel Hyrum Graff (Harrison Ford, or Michael Ironside) to become part of a child army defending the world from the White Walkers who threaten to attack from beyond the Wall. Here she meets Ender Wiggin (Asa Buttefield) and Danaerys Tagaryan (Emilia Clarke). After some unnecessary doggy fashion sex (add joke about a real Ender’s Game) during which plot points are made clear, the three are sent into battle only to find that Tyrion Lannister (Peter Dinklage) has stolen all the vowels from their names. Can Ktnss Vrdn, Ndr Wggn and Dnrys Tgryn find him and restore their vowels or must the world be saved by a bunch ridiculous sounding cnts?
Ender’s Hunger Games of Thrones will be out just as soon as it can be.