DONALD TRUMP CONSIDERING POLITICAL CAREER

HOLLYWOOD – Famed comedian and reality TV show personality, Donald Trump might consider one day running for office, it was revealed today.

The news comes as Donald Trump prepares for his guest host spot on Saturday Night Live this weekend.

A spokeswoman close to the Trump camp said:

Mr. Trump is a hilarious and highly articulate comedian who has been Andy Kaufman style situational comedy for the past twenty years or so. He is so committed to his comic art that he never breaks character. It is really unbelievable. The boorish, racist, sexist, stupid oaf that he hilariously holds up for lampooning and ridicule, he lives with that character 24/7. However, he is thinking about possibly running for political office so that he can perhaps more effectively criticize the right. He fears that his own practical joking of the GOP, his punking if you will, is being widely misinterpreted.

Saturday Night Live show runner Lorne Michaels dismissed criticism that Trump was already a Presidential candidate.

If you can’t see that clearly for the joke it is then you don’t understand comedy. One day Trump will be seen as one of the greats. A Sacha Baron Cohen of interventionist comedy, a Lenny Bruce. But like Stephen Colbert, there comes a time when the character becomes too restrictive. In private life Donald is really progressive and I could see him running just little left of Bernie Sanders, or perhaps as an independent.

However, many of his political opponents insist that Trump is not a clever comic playing an incredibly realistic and detailed buffoon of a character, but rather is in fact exactly what he seems. But with his closest rival Ben Carson insisting that he (Carson) did stab someone to death, it is becoming increasingly difficult to find out where the comedy ends and the politics begins, if it ever does.

Saturday Night Live will be recorded on Friday.

‘I AM NOT ANDY KAUFMAN’: IAN MCKELLEN DENIES RUMOR

LONDON – Gandalf, Magneto star and occasional actor, Sir Ian McKellen has angrily denied that he is Andy Kaufman (For the original story click here). ‘For a start I’m about ten years too old,’ yelled the Thespian.

He went on to remark:

I know what you arseholes are up to. You’re just spreading rumors and fake news to get cheap laughs. You’re a bunch of parasitical bum cracks. 

But Ian?

 SIR Ian! You jumped up little turd. I’m a respected f*cking theatre actor, I’ve played Lear, I’ve played Richard the Third, I was in Apt Pupil. I’m not the funny immigrant from Taxi, you twat! 

Keep your hair on, Gandalf.

Oh you want to dance, fart face? Is that what this is? You are in dangerous territory. Already Patrick Stewart was like, let’s just go and stomp their bullshit faces to hummus, let’s just tear them new effluent holes, but I was like we’re respected men of the theatre and the X-Men universe, Patrick, some decorum. He was in Dune, you shit stain! 

Okay, we’re sorry. If you want we’ll print a denial.

The mini-f*cking-mum.  

So you’re not Andy Kaufman?

No. Well… Not legally.

What do you mean ‘legally’?

What? No! The line is breaking up… sorry. I’ll call back. 

The Hobbit: the Desolation of Smaug will be amongst us Xmas-y.

ANDY KAUFMAN STILL ALIVE AND PLAYING IAN MCKELLEN AS ‘A JOKE’

HOLLYWOOD – The world of show business was in tatters last night as it was revealed that Andy Kaufman had in fact faked his death and had been living ever since under the assumed name Sir Ian McKellen as part of an elaborate prank.

Kaufman’s death in 1984 from cancer was reported and widely believed though rumors that he might have staged his death were even referenced in the Milos Forman biopic starring Jim Carrey Man in the Moon. A few months later Ian McKellen, a previously unheard of actor, stepped for the first time onto a stage in London’s West End and took the world of acting by storm. His meteoric rise took many by surprise including Shakespearean scholar Jonathan Tate:

McKellen sprung forth from the very loins of theatre-dom fully formed. His Richard III, his Lear and later his Gandalf and Magneto were the product of a prodigious talent. Now we finally can see that this was actually Kaufman who had honed his acting chops on the set of Taxi

IMDb are currently retrospectively reapportioning film credits over the next few days. When asked about his motivation for pretending to be the British thespian, Kaufman said:

I thought it would be funny. Then I just got carried away. 

A director’s cut of Man in the Moon featuring a 3 hour long alternative ending will be released in 2014.