AARON SORKIN TO REMAKE THE ARTIST

HOLLYWOOD – Aaron Sorkin is working on a remake of the Oscar winning The Artist.

Today, Aaron Sorkin announced this his next project will be a remake of the 2011 Oscar-winner The Artist.

The writer of the West Wing and Trial of the Chicago 7 spoke EXCLUSIVELY to the Studio Exec:

I’m a big fan of the film. I love Jean Dujardin and Bérénice Bejo. They are superb. So I was nervous. Why go to the bother of ruining something that’s so perfect? Right?

Well, yeah.

That’s what I thought. But then it occurred to me that I could see a way of putting the Sorkin stamp on it. There was one area that the film really lacked. Can you guess what it is?

It’s in black and white?

No. Well, yes, now you mention it, it is in black and white. Okay two areas. Jesus, maybe the film isn’t that good after all. Anyway, the one that irked me was the lack of dialogue.

Well, it’s a silent movie. 

So you noticed too. I mean I consider myself something of an expert when it comes to the witty dialogue exchange. Quick fire. Arguments. Jokes. The whole shebang. As I’ve explained in EVERY SINGLE INTERVIEW I’VE EVER DONE, I consider it to be like music. With its own rhythms and what not.

But the movie is supposed to be a tribute to the films of the silent era. 

Right. But without dialogue, I don’t even know how that is supposed to work.

Silent movies didn’t have dialogue. 

Fuck off.

It’s true. 

You mean to say there are a whole bunch of old films without witty quick fire screwball comedy style dialogue?

Erm. Yeah. Any film prior to 1927. 

Wooo-eee!

Aaron Sorkin’s The Artist drops on Netflix one of the Januarys.

FIRST LOOK AT AARON ECKHART AND RAY LIOTTA IN ONCE UPON A TIME IN HOLLYWOOD

HOLLYWOOD – Aaron Eckhart and Ray Liotta feature in the first official image from Quentin Tarantino’s Once Upon a Time in Hollywood.

The first image from the new Quentin Tarantino film – Once Upon a Time in Hollywood – hit the internets and comment is rife. The film set in the late sixties stars Ray Liotta and Aaron Eckhart as infamous LA detectives Freebie (Eckhart) and the Bean (Liotta), who are tasked with solving the Charlie Manson murders. Quentin Tarantino stumbled into the Studio Exec bungalow late last night stoned out of his gourd and commenced a-blabbering. So we turned the recorder on.

It’s really basic. During the 60s everything went crazy. You could ask an actress to drive down a dangerous road, no one gave a shit. In fact they thought you were a genius. Ask William Friedkin. They didn’t know they had it so good though. And along came Charlie.

How did you get Liotta to look so young?

I loved Ray in Goodfellas and though you should never really say this to an actor, I said to him: I want young Ray. He went off to Santa Monica and drank nothing but carrot juice for a month. They call it the Eastwood diet. It worked so well I got Eckhart to do it as well. Pacino couldn’t make it. He has a carrot allergy.

What made you think of these guys?

First, I wanted Brad Pitt and Leonardo di Caprio, but then I realized those bozos aren’t gonna cut the mustard. I need real pros. And Liotta and Eckhart are like fine wine. Pitt and Di Caprio are Mountain Dew. You get my meaning.

Once Upon a Time in Hollywood is out 2020.

ROLAND EMMERICH TALKS FACEBOOK DOWN MOVIE

HOLLYWOOD – For most of us it was a vaguely irritating absence of a social networking site but for Roland Emmerich it was a movie idea: Facebook Down will hit screens later this year.

The 2012 director spoke to the Studio Exec EXCLUSIVELY:

I’ve been wanting to make a picture like the Social Network for years, but the problem was it was all yackety yak. You really need something a bit more exciting to happen than for one rich guy to do over another rich guy and hurt their feelings. So when Facebook went down today, I thought this is it. Here I go. I’ve got Aaron Eckhart to play the terrorist Mr. MySpace, Jamie Foxx will reprise his role as President Broback Obamack. Channing Tatum is on board again as the male stripper turned head of presidential security, Mike. When this movie comes out, you’ll like it.

I certainly hope so.

No I mean you’ll like it. As in you’ll click that little thumbs up button.

Oh I get it.

Then why aren’t you laughing?

Ha. Ha ha.

The story is simple. Myspace is wracked with jealousy at the success of Jesse Eisenberg’s Facebook, so with the help of Eisenberg’s arch enemy Spider-Man (Andrew Garfield), he goes in and creates a glitch, threatening the world with no way of saying what’s on their mind. Unless they have twitter.

Facebook Down will be released Tuesday. 

NEIL LABUTE’S NEW VERSION OF OLIVER! DEBUTS OFF BROADWAY

NEW YORK – Neil LaBute might be more famous for his acerbic big screen satires such as The Company of Men and Your Friends and Neighbors, but now he’s trying his hand at a musical with what he bills as a re-imagining of the Lionel Bart musical Oliver!

Starring Aaron Eckhart as the eponymous waif, LaBute’s new version has been described by the director as ‘a harsh corrective, bringing back the horror to what is essentially a story about child abuse. But we still have the wonderful songs.’

Speaking EXCLUSIVELY to the Studio Exec, LaBute said:

I’ve always been a big fan of the musical as a form and when I was talking to Aaron one night he just said, well why not? And then the search was on to find the right one. I had thought of My Fair Lady, because that would give me scope to look into the brutalities of misogyny, but then Aaron said we’ve kind of already done that. Then I thought of Frozen and the hidden subtext of homophobia and exploitation but Disney weren’t interested in my reading. So at last we came to Oliver! And I have to say I am very pleased.

Joining Eckhart’s Oliver, will be Vin Diesel as Bill Sikes and John Goodman as Mr. Bumble. Bryan Cranston will join the run as Fagin, delighting audiences with a horrifying insight into evil and such hits as You’ve Gotta Pick-a-Pocket or Two and Food, Glorious Food!

Oliver! will run from next Monday until Wednesday. 

MARY SHELLEY LETTER INSPIRES ‘I, FRANKENSTEIN’

ROME – A letter from Nineteenth Century author Mary Wolstonescraft Shelley was published yesterday by the producers of the new adaptation of her novel I, Frankenstein.

The producers claim the letter was written to her husband Percy Bysshe Shelley and shows clearly that she would have approved of the most recent film version of her classic work of Gothic horror Frankenstein.  

My Dearest Bysshe,

The house is empty without you and the children fractious in the extreme. Albeit I understand your absence – Byron has need of you counsel now more than ever – I cannot feign the high spirits I know you value in a consort but must open my heart and allow you to see the pain writ therein. To further add to my melancholic frame of my mind the first edition of my novel came and my disappointment knew no bounds – I write of course of Frankenstein.

The problems with the book are manifold. Why did I set it in a contemporary period? I should have followed your advice and placed the actions many years into the future. And why did I not give the monster adversaries more monstrous than he? He should have had to battle unconvincing gargoyles and angels, armed perhaps with some strange half disc knives and fighting techniques known only to those of the orient?

However all this is mere quibbling compared with the source of my main dissatisfaction. Why waste so much time on his creation and the subsequent metaphysical doodling between the creature and his creator Victor? There is hardly any time for fighting.

All I can hope, nay pray, is that someone perhaps the producers of the fabled Underworld series of which the prophecy speaks will take my idea and make of it what they will. Improve it with their skills and those of Mr. Aaron Eckhart who was so good in Thank You for Smoking and very little else.

 Be careful on your trip home. The seas can be choppy this time of year. 

Love your little dormouse,

Mary 

I, Frankenstein is due out January 2014.