SPIELBERG ADMITS FAKING CHINESE MOON LANDING
It wasn’t the billion dollars they gave me. It wasn’t even the threats to have me sewn into a bag and dropped into the Yellow River with a live cobra if I turned them down. It was because I wanted to emulate my hero, the great Stanley Kubrick.
I got drunk with Stan one evening and after a few bottles of cognac, he pulled me close and said, “Steven, I have something extremely important to tell you but you can’t tell another living soul. I had to fire Harvey Kietel from Eyes Wide Shut after he accidentally ejaculated into Nicole Kidman’s hair during a sex scene”. I was shocked by this of course but then he added, “Oh yeah, by the way I also faked the moon landing.”
I just did it for a laugh because I was bored editing 2001. Then somehow Tricky Dicky Nixon got hold of the footage and the rest is history. Hell, if I’d have known it was going to be released I’d have got Kirk Douglas to play Neil Armstrong.
It was all done on Green Screen and I don’t know whether he’d want me to reveal this but Andy Serkis is playing the Chinese Lunar Rover. He’s currently in a zero gravity room inside my studio wired to an Apple Mac.
George knows. I ran the idea by him and he said that the Rover should discover some loveable and cuddly creatures. that way the kids would get behind the mission and we’d make a ton of money selling action figures. Good old George, always thinking with his wallet.