HOLLYWOOD – A fresh email leak has revealed that throughout the 1980s Sony funded a top secret assassination program called Project Walkman.
Carol Hake, the head of Sony’s Innovation and Technology department contacted Scott Rudin last May amid fears a former agent of the program had gone rogue:
I’ve just heard from Agent K. He confirms that Agent F has gone off the reservation. Headquarters are worried and are looking to implement the fail-safe.
Your advice has been requested.
P.S Lovely to see you and Gina the other night. We’ll do it again soon.
I’ve spoken to Agent D and he confirms Agent K’s intel about Agent F. It doesn’t look good but we’ve been here before. You remember Cannes 92?
Let me talk to Agent X and get back to you.
Have you heard from Agent X?
We pulled Agent D, Agent M and Agent O in for a debrief. They all confirm our worst suspicions about Agent F. The top brass are getting twitchy but I won’t give the order until you make contact.
Sorry about the late reply I ran into Shia LeBeouf on Sunset and we went for a few drinks. I spoke to Agent X and he said to call off the attack dogs. Agent F is solid it was just a misunderstanding.
Hope you’re well.
You went for a few drinks? I haven’t heard from you in three f*cking weeks!
You’re too late. Agent F has been erased. You never made contact so they think you’re been turned. They’ll track your email and send somebody over. Get out of the house NOW!
Ha-Ha, very funny. You had me there for a second.
You know how it is, when you’re partying with Shia time runs away with you.
I’ve got to go, Will Smith has arrived unexpectedly and I…