HOLLYWOOD – Hi guys, Sean Penn here. I just wanted to cut through the bullshit a second and make something clear to all the people who have been watching my career recently with some bemusement. I know exactly what you’re thinking: what the f*ck is Shanghai Surprise (as I prefer to be known) up to?
Gangster Squad stank of thrice used, thrice unflushed toilet water. The Secret Life of Walter Mitty was almost terminally unfunny. Tree of Life? Tree. Of. Life?
Okay, I hear you. I feel your pain. These aren’t Dead Man Walking, or 21 Grams, or Milk. They’re not even I am Sam! So what gives Penn?
Well, I’ll tell you. As many of you probably know as well as being a world famous film actor, I’m also something of a political activist with outspoken views on lots of different topics. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not a liberal. No, I’m actually a radical. Yeah. I know.
And it occurred to me not so long ago that this making films lark is highly dubious from a ‘bringing down the system’ point of view. At least, it is if the films are successful. So what I decided was that I would make films and choose roles specifically to destroy the ideological homogeneity engine that is Hollywood from within by making terrible films. I dipped a toe in with The Interpreter. Then a whole foot with All the King’s Men. Gangster Squad and Mitty were the equivalent of full immersion. If you want to take a photo of the Hollywood sign do so now, because the foundations are shaking and the whole thing is going to Emmerich under the weight of my underwhelming output. There’s no way the Entertainment Industry can survive this level of mediocrity. Just you wait.
Sean Penn will be appearing in Any Which Way But Loose in 2016.