SEAN PENN ENDORSES MITT ROMNEY
WASHINGTON – In a shock turnaround, Sean Penn has publicly endorsed Mitt Romney for President at a rally in Tampa earlier today.
The My Name is Sam star and famed radical activist and campaigner explained his change of heart to a packed crowd at a Mitt is It rally. ‘I realised how much I earn,’ Penn blustered. ‘So fuck yeah, he’s got my vote.’
Penn joins a whole barrage of erstwhile liberals in lining up behind the Mittster who has promised cut taxes and allow poor people to be legally hunted as game.
Michael Moore said earlier this week that being right wing and crazy ‘was just more funny’. And Tim Robbins and Susan Sarandon said they believed that many stars were attracted to Romney’s lack of charisma.
‘You hang around show people all the time with their humor and excitement and sparkling conversation and it’s tiring,’ the Rocky Horror Picture Show strumpet remarked. ‘With Mr. Romney you’re safe from any danger of being remotely interested in anything he has to say.’
Some have linked Penn’s change of heart to the fact that although he was definitely gay in Milk, he appears to be married in This is not the Place. Whilst many see this as further evidence that Mitt Romney is in fact a character created by Sacha Baron Cohen for a new comedy film.