Int: Taxi
An elderly Travis Bickle is driving around modern New York picking up fares. Various characters get in and out of his cab until eventually, he picks up a priest.
Priest
St Patrick’s on Madison
Travis
No problem
They drive
Travis
Hey, are you a real padre, padre?
Priest
What gave it away?
Travis
You know the whole dog collar thing. I figured you’re either a priest or you’re going to a fancy dress party.
Priest
I’m the real deal Son.
Travis
Okay. Good, good for you.
They continue driving
Travis
Hey I don’t suppose you have any proof that you’re a priest. You know like a card or something?
Priest
Why do you require proof?
Travis
I don’t require proof. I’m just asking that’s all. I was thinking maybe if you was a real priest I might give you a discount or something.
Priest
Ah. Well in that case. I do happen to have a card.
He passes it to Travis
Travis
Father James Brogan. St Patrick’s Cathedral. Mind if I keep this?
Priest
By all means
They continue driving
Travis
So father I’ve got a few things to get off my chest. You know like a confession type thing and I was wondering if you can do me favour.
Priest
You want me to take your confession now, in this taxi?
Travis
Well I would come into the church and all but then I’d have to find a parking spot and stand in line. How’s about we do it here and this cab ride is on me? I’ll be quick I promise. Scout’s honour.
Priest
Well okay then. Just make it quick.
Travis
I will I promise. Okay so a few decades ago I got into this thing with this teenage prostitute and I ended up shooting a bunch of guys dead.
Priest
Pardon me
Travis
Yeah but I got away with that one it’s kind of a water under the bridge thing. Anyway after that I kind of got a taste for it. I just started killing random people. I picked them up in my cab then take them out of town, you know to some place quiet. Then I’d shoot them, chop them up and dissolve their corpses in a drum of acid. Sometimes I’d keep one of their body parts as a trophy. Usually their head and I did try and cannibalise a few but to be honest with you, I didn’t really like the taste. Anyway I kinda got bored of that and started doing these crazy things. You remember the Challenger Space shuttle that exploded? That was me and I went over to Russia and caused the Chernobyl meltdown. I committed a few acts of mass genocide in Africa, stabbed a couple of cats, oh, and then I flew one of the planes into the World Trade Centre.
Priest
Is that it?
Travis
Well no. There’s a bunch of other stuff too but my memory isn’t what it used to be.
Priest
Okay. May God grant you pardon and peace. I absolve you of your sins in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Travis
What is that it? I’m forgiven?
Priest
You’re all square with the lord.
Travis
But I’ve killed like, millions of people.
Priest
Look son. I don’t make the rules I just enforce them. Now if you’ll just drop me off on the corner and I’ll walk the rest of the way.
The Priest looks out the window and see’s that he’s in the middle of nowhere.
Priest
Wait a minute, where the hell are we?
Travis pulls a gun on the priest.
Priest
Stop! What are you doing?
Travis
Sorry Padre but I don’t make the rules. I just enforce them.
Priest
No, wait!
Travis shoots him in the head
FIN
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