SCRIPT LEAK:TAXI DRIVER 2


Int: Taxi

An elderly Travis Bickle is driving around modern New York picking up fares. Various characters get in and out of his cab until eventually, he picks up a priest.

Priest

St Patrick’s on Madison

Travis

No problem
They drive
Travis

Hey, are you a real padre, padre?

Priest

What gave it away?

Travis

You know the whole dog collar thing. I figured you’re either a priest or you’re going to a fancy dress party.

Priest

I’m the real deal Son.

Travis

Okay. Good, good for you.

They continue driving

Travis

Hey I don’t suppose you have any proof that you’re a priest. You know like a card or something?

Priest

Why do you require proof?
Travis

I don’t require proof. I’m just asking that’s all. I was thinking maybe if you was a real priest I might give you a discount or something.
Priest

Ah. Well in that case. I do happen to have a card.

He passes it to Travis

Travis

Father James Brogan. St Patrick’s Cathedral. Mind if I keep this?
Priest

By all means

They continue driving
Travis

So father I’ve got a few things to get off my chest. You know like a confession type thing and I was wondering if you can do me favour.

Priest

You want me to take your confession now, in this taxi?

Travis

Well I would come into the church and all but then I’d have to find a parking spot and stand in line.  How’s about we do it here and this cab ride is on me? I’ll be quick I promise. Scout’s honour.

Priest

Well okay then. Just make it quick.

Travis

I will I promise. Okay so a few decades ago I got into this thing with this teenage prostitute and I ended up shooting a bunch of guys dead.

Priest

Pardon me
Travis

Yeah but I got away with that one it’s kind of a water under the bridge thing. Anyway after that I kind of got a taste for it. I just started killing random people. I picked them up in my cab then take them out of town, you know to some place quiet. Then I’d shoot them, chop them up and dissolve their corpses in a drum of acid.  Sometimes I’d keep one of their body parts as a trophy. Usually their head and I did try and cannibalise a few but to be honest with you, I didn’t really like the taste. Anyway I kinda got bored of that and started doing these crazy things. You remember the Challenger Space shuttle that exploded? That was me and I went over to Russia and caused the Chernobyl meltdown. I committed a few acts of mass genocide in Africa, stabbed a couple of cats, oh, and then I flew one of the planes into the World Trade Centre.

Priest

Is that it?

Travis

Well no.  There’s a bunch of other stuff too but my memory isn’t what it used to be.

Priest

Okay.  May God grant you pardon and peace.  I absolve you of your sins in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Travis

What is that it? I’m forgiven?

Priest

You’re all square with the lord.

Travis

But I’ve killed like, millions of people.

Priest

Look son. I don’t make the rules I just enforce them. Now if you’ll just drop me off on the corner and I’ll walk the rest of the way.
The Priest looks out the window and see’s that he’s in the middle of nowhere.
Priest

Wait a minute, where the hell are we?
Travis pulls a gun on the priest.
Priest

Stop! What are you doing?

Travis

Sorry Padre but I don’t make the rules. I just enforce them.

Priest

No, wait!

Travis shoots him in the head
                     
                           FIN
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