HOLLYWOOD – Read the script for Guy Ritchie’s live-action remake of Disney’s Aladdin.
News that Guy Ritchie’s live action Aladdin has been green lit hit the internet yesterday. Today, the Studio Exec got EXCLUSIVE access to the script. Here is an excerpt.
EXT: THE DESERT. NIGHT
Aladdin, his pet pit bull Stains and Jafar approach the mouth of the cave.
JAFFAR
Aladdin, you slag! Get in that f*cking cave and get me my effing lamp.
ALADDIN
Awight, me old mucker! Be out in a jiffy.
INT. CAVE. NIGHT
Aladdin searches through piles of treasure, flies a magic carpet with Stainsand finds the lamp.
ALADDIN
Jesus H. This lamp’s bleedin’ filthy. I’m gonna give it a good old rub.
Rubbing the lamp, Aladdin releases a huge blue Genie!
GENIE
Two thousand years is such a pain the ARSE!
ALADDIN
Cor blimey!
GENIE
Awight Guvnor. What can I do for you? You got yerself three cups and dishes.
ALADDIN
Cups and dishes.
GENIE
Cups and dishes – Wishes. Shine a light.
ALADDIN
Awight. I’ll have a motor, a nice new gaff and a packet of fish and chips please.
GENIE
Whoa! Hold your horses mucker. Doncha wanna become a Prince, impress Princess Jasmine, fly around the world singing a song.
ALADDIN
What a chump! Wait. I’ll have a pint of warm beer instead of the fish and chips. What was I thinking?
Stains, Genie and Aladdin sing a ‘Whole New World’ and get pissed up on booze.
THE END