ryan reynolds

HOLLYWOOD – Today it was revealed that Canadian heart throb and RIPD star Ryan Reynolds had eyes that were ‘too close together’. 

Prof. Paul Gattis – a scientist from NASA – said that it looked as if ‘someone had surgically transplanted a fourteen year old’s face onto the head of a thirty something man. Like in that John Travolta movie. You know the one!’

For years the Green Hornet   Lantern star has been plagued by criticism that his ocular proximity impeded any enjoyment a viewer might take in his films, whereas other’s claimed that it actually served to distract people from the lack of talent when it came to something as basic as line reading. However, the confirmation that Ryan Reynolds’ eyes are too close together will lend weight to other criticisms that ‘he looks funny’ and is ‘creepy.’

However, many leaped to Mr. Ryans’ defence. Milly Arscnit reminded everyone that:

Ryan Reynolds is the best actor Vancouver has ever produced in 1976 who appeared in The Green Hornet.

You mean Lantern.


The Voices will be released in 2014. 

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  1. I know, this thing does not deserve a comment. Let me tell you, though, that when one looks as Reynolds does, he might have just one eye, as far as I am concerned. Creepy? Hahahaha. Freekin’ gorgeous. NASA should send Prof. Gattis (nice invention, by the way) to Mars.

  2. everybody in Hollywood has some kind of ding to them most of them have speech impediment and they’re too short that’s why they’re hiding in Hollywood they’re a shame to come into the real world and get criticized and get picked on by the real poor people of the world oh yeah they’re all gay too and I dislike gay people I would kill them all but I don’t have enough bullets

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