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Wednesday 20 November 2019
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ROBERT DOWNEY JR’S DOG TALKS DOCTOR DOOLITTLE

ROBERT DOWNEY JR’S DOG TALKS DOCTOR DOOLITTLE

HOLLYWOOD – We talk to Robert Downey Jr’s dog about preparations for his new film The Voyage of Doctor Doolittle.

Iron Man star Robert Downey Jr is to play Doctor Doolittle in a new film The Voyage of Doctor Doolittle. This came as no surprise to Bangs, Downey Jr’s ten-year-old sheep dog. Bangs sat down to talk EXCLUSIVELY to the Studio Exec:

Robert’s excited about the new film. He could talk about nothing else. I remember when Eddie Murphy played the role, the animal community was horrified. You see Murphy played Donkey in Shrek as well and we saw that as taking a job from a real donkey. It isn’t like donkeys have much opportunity to work and for a human actor to take a role like that, well for us it’s as bad as black face.

How is Robert’s Bark?

Oh, it’s worse than his bite. Ha ha ha. No just a little sheep dog humor there. No, it’s good. And he’s fluent in cat, though that is mainly facial expression and inscrutable stares. Goldfish he’s got down but that’s such a small vocabulary. He’s going to have to pick up some of the more exotic languages. Giraffe, lion, elephant, cobra, llama, rhinoceros and hippopotamus. Russell Crowe came over last night and was teaching him the basics of kangaroo.

That sounds great. You must have been jumping for joy. 

That’s just racist. What the fuck is wrong with you man?

I’m sorry I just meant…

I know exactly what you meant. You fucking humans are all the same. You finally start speaking to us and all you can do is make lame jokes and trade in reductive stereotypes. Man, Caesar is right about you assholes!

Who’s Caesar?

I don’t need to tell you nothing. Wait until Robert hears about this. He’s going to be madder than a motherfucker. No respect. You got no respect.

Fetch!

Wait, where’d it go? Where’d it go?

The Voyage of Doctor Doolittle will be released in 2018.

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