HANNIBAL: REVIEW – Jesus Christ, it’s awful.
The fat guy from The Matrix teams up with Hugh English Guy blinky blinky Dancy to try and catch a bafflingly elaborate serial killer through a combination of psycho-babble and CGI rewind stuff. It’s like CSI meets… no it’s just like CSI basically. CSI: Freud. But with the arrival of Mads Bond villain Mikkelsen as the eponymous psychiatrist/cannibal now it looks set to become CSI: Dexter.
This is the kind of show where people hold entire conversations circling each other in artfully lit rooms and impossibly young experts natter routinely in crime scenes that look like they’ve been invented by a set designer who has seen a lot of serial killer movies but not many houses. The blood is CGI globular and crimson; the acting is arch when not ham and there are lines like ‘Don’t psychoanalyse me. You won’t like me when I’m psychoanalysed’ which I honestly can’t tell if they’re supposed to be laughable (i.e. comic) or if it’s just laughable (i.e. inept). Could still be fun, but not for the reasons they intended.