OCEAN’S EIGHT RUINS MAN’S EARLY MIDDLE AGE
ALASKA – The new female led Oceans film – Ocean’s Eight – has ruined a man’s early middle age, it was revealed today.
The 2017 remake of the 2001 remake of the 1960 Frank Sinatra relatively uninspired rat pack movie Ocean’s Eight will star Sandra Bullock in the Danny Ocean role as well as Cate Blanchett, Helena Bonham Carter and Mindy Kalin. Joining the cast will possibly be Rihanna and Anne Hathaway. However, the news has been greeted with despair by some fans of the original remake.
Richard LeComte Mets fan and theatre critic told the Studio Exec:
I was forty three when the original film came out. I remember queuing to see it with my first wife. We both like George Clooney and Brad Pitt for obviously different reasons. And we thought of Matt Damon as that promising young actor from Good Will Hunting and not the monster he has become. So the impact on my middle age can’t be overstated. It was vitally important in making me the man I would become a decade and a half later. And to have that film ruined again. After it was already ruined by Ocean’s 12 and 13 is just more than I can bear. I mean… women. What’s gotten into them?