HOLLYWOOD – The Hollywood Celebrity Guild announced today that there would be no Ice Bucket Challenge in support of Ebola victims because the disease was just ‘a little bit too icky’ and it ‘weirded us all out’.
The news came when it was revealed that the self-aggrandizing instagram fueled charity phenomena would not be repeated for a disease which as of October 15 has seen 4,493 fatalities out of 8,997 cases in West Africa, the worst hit region, according to World Health Organisation figures.
Bono and Sting are currently sitting down with Angelina Jolie and Steven Spielberg to see if they can work out some wacky way celebrities can help while still taking Selfies.
Delbert Pittigul of the HCG told the Studio Exec EXCLUSIVELY:
This is a doozie! I mean obviously this is a terrible disease and people are dying but the thing is how can we make it sexy and fun? Hard right? We can’t dump ice water over our heads because many of these victims are Africans and so the iced water is a little insensitive given the shortage of clean drinking water in many areas. And even if we do come up with some wonderful stunt that’ll look good on YouTube, I mean look at it, we can’t even try to make it go viral, because well, Ebola is a virus. And that’s the last thing you want, Ebola going viral, right? If only Ellen DeGeneres was here now.
Meanwhile, those engaged in satirical websites carry on the tireless battle to rid the world of evil.