NICK CAVE’S GLADIATOR 2 SCRIPT LEAKED
SYDNEY – Everyone was eagerly awaiting cheery Australian songster and Lawless scriptwriter Nick Cave’s sequel to Gladiator – tentatively entitled Gladiator 2 – but Ridley Scott decided to do Prometheus instead.
However, the Studio Exec has managed to get his hands on the Gladiator 2 script.
1. The Colosseum. We begin where the first film ended. The EMPRESS finishes her oration and lowers her arms. The Crowd is hushed. MAXIMUS and COMMODUS lie on the ground dead.
Who will lift this man and carry him to his final resting place?
Senator GRACCHUS comes forward and with the help of the other Gladiators, they lift the body of MAXIMUS. The crowd watches in silence. Petals drift in the the sand. COMMODUS’ body is forgotten where it lies. Stirring music as the funeral procession heads for the gates.
Wait! I’m not dead.
A miracle! Thank the Gods. Oh happy day!
MAXIMUS is helped to his feet. The crowd cheers.
But Commodus stabbed you through the heart with his red right hand.
I know I thought I was going from her (points to EMPRESS) to eternity, but this deflected the blow.
MAXIMUS loosens his breast plate and the steel guitar is revealed which deflected the blow.
T’is stranger than kindness. Quick let him have a (oh mercy) seat.
Give us a song!
Well, I’m a little rusty (strumming guitar: Starts singing). This is a weeping song – Come on everybody.
(Singing)A song in which to weep!