Mike Myers eaten by a Vulture “I thought he was dead!” said the Vulture.

Taylor Swift to write a song about writing a song tentatively titled I’m writing a song about writing a song.

Joe Pesci claims he’s nervous about becoming a made guy in the Mafia. “I’ve seenGoodfellas” said Joe.

Roman Polanski turns down the the prize of a 1stclass flight to California he won in the LAPD charity raffle. “I can’t remember entering any raffle,” said a puzzled Polanski.

James Cameron’splanned 3D retrofit of Citizen Kane is postponed after the director was hospitalized due to an alleged attack by the ghost of Orson Welles.

Miley Cyrus stuns the VMA awards when she pours herself a glass of water backstage. “It was a stunning individual performance,” said Jennifer Lopez. “I have like, five members of staff who pour my water. That girl is talented.”

Anne Hathaway is to play Miss Elizabeth opposite Johnny Depp’s Macho Man Randy Savage in Mike Leigh’sWrestlemania: The Musical.

Robin Thicke caught in the bathrooms at the VMAs reading Germaine Greer’sThe Female Eunuch.

Batman claims he is “delighted” that Ben Affleckis playing him in an upcoming movie. “I loved him in Dazed and Confused,” said the Caped Crusader.

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