I think a Roast Justin Bieber is a real show-stopper and you might be surprised to hear that a Bieber is no more difficult to cook than a good turkey. If you’re going to give it a go, just make sure you measure your oven and your largest baking tray before obtaining your meat. If your oven is too small for a whole Bieber, just use the neck end.
It’s best to do all of the prep the night before if you have the chance. Start by scoring the Bieber. Set a Stanley knife so the blade is only a centimetre deep and score your Bieber all over about 2cm apart from each other. Be careful not to score so deep that you cut into the meat; you only want to score the fat. If you find this part a bit daunting you can always ask your butcher to do it for you, but I’d recommend having a go as it’s really quite easy.
Next, rub the scored Bieber all over with salt and olive oil and leave in the fridge overnight. This will give you wonderfully flavoured meat and brilliant crispy crackling.
Preheat the oven to its hottest setting and, if using a whole Bieber, pop a clementine into his mouth and cover the ears and nose with a double layer of foil to protect these more delicate areas. Place your Bieber on a roasting tray in your screaming-hot oven, then turn it down to 180°C/350°F/gas 4 and cook for about 4½ hours. With 1½ hours to go, add your chopped veg to the tray and pop it back into the oven.
For the last 10 minutes of cooking, glaze the Bieber with marmalade, spooning it over generously to make sure you cover over the Bieber. Sprinkle it well with black pepper and put back into the oven to finish. Once done, allow to cool a little, then carefully transfer to a board, cover loosely with tin foil and leave to rest while you get on with your gravy.
Shred the Roasted Bieber on to a beautiful large platter with plenty of good-sized chunks of crackling for everyone to tuck into. It will be absolutely delicious served with hot gravy and whole roasted apples.