Larry Vaughn

AMITY – Former Mayor of Amity, Larry Vaughn tapped to head the CDC.

Unsuccessful presidential candidate and popular mayor Larry Vaughn will take over the CDC from Friday, the White House announced today. Robert Redfield currently heads the Centres for Disease Control and Prevention, but will step down. Vaughn first came to prominence during his tenure as mayor of Amity, a small town which was terrorized by a Great White Shark. It is this experience of crisis management which caught President Donald Trump’s eye.

A source from the White House told the Studio Exec:

Larry has lots of experience. He knows how to balance public safety with the need to keep the economy running. We’re also looking to the long term. We would like everything to be back to normal by July the 4th, something he is keen on also.

Vaughn himself told the press he looks forward to taking over the position.

I see myself and President Trump as very much cast from the same mold. We’re both businessmen, but we’re also fathers, and even grandfathers, I think. Coronavirus is getting all the headlines at the moment but people don’t seem to realise that sharks are now an endangered species. Surely, the time has come to wipe them out entirely.

Larry Vaughn is available for Bar Mitzvahs, Birthday Parties and public speaking engagements.

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