WESTEROS – Season 4 of Game of Thrones – based on George JRR Martin’s Song of Fire and Ice series – is due to be broadcast in 2014, but the Studio Exec managed to get a sneak peek at the new season EXCLUSIVELY and has to report a radical departure from the tone of the first three seasons as well as the books.

Show runner David Benioff ushering us into the HBO screening room muttered testily:

We all got real bored of the traipsing about from hither to yon, borken occasionally by some bloody violence or gratuitous sexual tickle and slappery. Plus I’ve read the books so I knew that we were in for more of the same. Traipse, traipse, slash, slash, slap-tickle. We thought let’s have some fun.

Although what we saw was an assemble cut without music, special effects and with some scenes missing, it was immediately apparent that the show had changed direction. Here are some notes we took:

  • Peter Dinklage‘s wonderful Tyrion Lannister is killed off very early in the first episode. There was no discernible reason for this, but Benioff mentioned that the star was making demands and had become power crazy. He’s killed in a tennis accident. 
  • Every time Daenerys Targaryen (Emilia Clarke) appears on screen with her dragons to try and raise an army, all her clothes fall off and there’s a Benny Hill like chase, during one such chase they all have to jump sharks. 
  • The White Walkers from the North of the Wall kill and eat Jon Snow (Kit Harington) and then die of being boringness. 
  • Sean Bean comes back as Ned Stark, but is killed in every episode as a tribute to Kenny from South Park
Game of Thrones Season 4 will be broadcast in 2014.
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