HOLLYWOOD – Donald Trump to star in Pink Flamingos 2: Eat Shit And Die.
Newly deposed fascist despot Donald Trump stars in Pink Flamingos 2: Eat Shit And Die. The Exec caught up with the director John Waters to discuss the sequel to his 1972 dog-poop noshing comedy classic.
Thanks for coming to the Exec bungalow for a chat. Tell us about your new movie.
Firstly, can I just say what a delightful bungalow you got here. It’s always pleasure to meet up with The Exec. But let’s get down to business; Pink Flamingos 2: Eat Shit And Die will be a companion piece rather a sequel, in the traditional sense of the word.
How so?
I’m glad you asked me that. Rather than subverting America’s view of itself by using gross-out tactics and guerrilla style film making, I’ve got Donald Trump to star in it.
Donald Trump Pink Flamingos. Wow. That’s quite a ballsy move.
Thank you Mr Exec. I called him up and said to him that now he’s off Twitter and pretty much every social media platform, he needs to get his face out there. If his brand is to carry on squeezing his slack-jawed, entitled, mouth breathing, racist demographic, he’s gotta stay relevant. You know what? The prick went for it.
Who will Trump play? Will it be the role Divine played, ‘Babs Johnson’?
Fuck, no. Divine was a talented comic genius with a huge sense of humanity, compared to Trump. As most are. Trump is going to play Babs Johnson’s adopted son, Boris.
Donald Trump is going to play… Boris Johnson?
Yeah, that’s right. And you know what happens in the film? The title kinda gives it away. He spends 145 minutes eating shit. Every kind of shit you can think of. There’s dog shit, cat shit, cow shit, bull shit, ape shit, diarrhoea, baby shit, pensioner shit and pig shit. So he sits at a big fucking gold table in Mar-A-Largo and brought plate after plate of shit, and you know who brings it to him?
No. Who?
Mexicans. Muslims. Black people. Disabled people. Rape victims. Child abuse victims. People who can’t afford healthcare. Just ordinary decent folk who care about people that are different to them. They all bring him shit. So he just chows right down on it. Then the fucker dies. Chokes on shit. Fade to pink.
Take my money now. Thank you John Waters.
Fuckin A, bubba.