CHRISTOPHER NOLAN WARNER BROS UNCOUPLE

Christopher Nolan Warner Bros

MOVIE NEWS – With the Christopher Nolan Warner Bros partnership coming to an end, The Exec sat down to talk with a Warner Bros PR spokesperson. We find out how the Christopher Nolan Warner Bros conscious uncoupling came about and was it really mutual?

Sorry To Ask But How Did Christopher Nolan & Warner Bros Uncouple?

That’s ok [sniff]. I guess we need to talk it through with someone [sniff]. Just to try and make sense of it all. Y’know what I mean [sniff]? I thought we were in a good place. Thought we were secure in our relationship. People always said he was a cold one, but you never really believe it, until it happens to you. And then he just left. Didn’t leave a note or anything [sniff].

Were There Any Signs This Was Coming?

What do you mean? Are you saying it’s our fault? We gave everything [sniff] to this relationship. Showered him with money for anything he wanted to do. We never asked any questions. And what do we get in return (apart from billions of dollars in revenue)? He goes to Universal [sniff]. Universal? What the fuck is he going to do over there? Make Smokey And The Bandit? What a crock of shit.

Do You Think There Was Anything You Could Have Done Differently?

I guess we could have spent less time with Zack Snyder and Matt Reeves. But we were just fooling around, having a bit of fun at work. They meant nothing. Literally nothing. Have you seen the returns? Jesus [sniff]. What a waste of fucking time those guys were.

And What About You With HBO Max?

Oh, here we go [cries]! You’re going to rub that in our face. It was just a small deal. We flirted for a bit with streaming. They got knocked up with our movies last year, and that’s it. We’re tied to them for the rest of our fucking lives.

Well, It Is Your Contractual Responsibility And Commitment.

Now you just sound like our parent company and investors. Fuck you [sniff].

Christopher Nolan Will Shoot His Next Movie About Oppenheimer, With Universal.

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