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Tuesday 19 November 2019
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CHRISTIAN BALE ARRESTED

CHRISTIAN BALE ARRESTED

MIAMI – Christian Bale was arrested at a hotel suite in Miami, Florida in the early hours of this morning following a 911 call from a man identifying himself as Michael Keaton. A spokesman for the Miami PD in a statement issued shortly after 6 AM said ‘A young Caucasian adult male who has played Batman and is not Michael Keaton, or Adam West, was arrested at his hotel room at 4.13 this morning and charged with illegal possession of property.’
The possessions that were confiscated are thought to be a box set of Season 2 of The Wire which Christian Bale is believed to have borrowed from Mr. Keaton last Christmas and has not, as yet ‘got round  to watching, though I’ve heard some really good things about it,’ as he told Rolling Stone in May. Mr. Keaton befriended Mr. Bale following his casting as Batman:

Christian called me up and asked if I had the second season of The Wire, as he’d just finished the first and was really hooked. I said sure, but I knew what he was really saying to me was come and give me advice, I want to sit at the feet of the master. The Batman.

Some have accused Mr Keaton of resenting Bale’s success in the role and entrapping him. Catherine Zeta Jones screamed at reporters: ‘That Beetlejuice asshole has always had it in for Christian.’ Some have even claimed that Mr Bale was lured to Florida, innocent of that State’s draconian DVD box set laws, which were recently buttressed with a provision allowing for chemical ‘limb-utation’ for anyone keeping a HBO series for more than two months.

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