BREAKFAST WITH ASSHOLES 21: LUKE SKYWALKER

Luke (1977)





TATOOINE – Luke Skywalker – the real life inspiration for George Lucas’ young farm boy turned Death Star redecorator – has spoken for the first time about the impact Star Wars has had on his life.
We met at Dex’s Diner just outside of Beggar’s Canyon and spoke over a breakfast of coffee and flapjacks. 

How did you first meet George Lucas?

It were the seventies and George came into my uncle’s shop to get himself a tattoo. He wanted something to remember American Graffiti by. And my Uncle Owen was doing it and Georgie there, well he was nervous as all hell and he kept on saying smaller, smaller. And so I said “Shucks, you don’t want a tattoo you want a tattoo-weeny.” He began scribbling stuff down after that in this yella pad.

When did you realise he had used you as inspiration?

I went along to see the film everyone was talking about and I was aghast. He’d used Uncle Owen, Aunt Beru, he’d even taken the name of the Moss Eisley Shopping Mall from Alderaanville. So the whole county was talking about it.

Why haven’t you talked about it until now?

We originally thought we can make some money out of this. Have like tourists come and visit. But it turned out that George had gone straight to the town hall after he got his tattoo and bought the job lot of us due to a loophole Steven Spielberg had told him about in them there slave laws they used to have. We was all indentured to him as part of his ancillary rights. Weren’t nothing we could do. Then last week he came back to town and done freed us all. He’d seen Lincoln and saw the error of his ways. So now we can talk.

That’s amazing! And how has your life changed now?

I don’t think it’s changed that much. I’ve got my family. I am happily married to Leia.

Oh so in real life she isn’t your sister?  

 No, she is.

Star Wars 7 is due to be released in 2015. 

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