BLACK FRIDAY FOOTAGE FAKED

black friday

HOLLYWOOD – All major new channels have been accused of faking Black Friday footage of shoppers going crazy and fighting with each other in what is being called ‘a planned conspiracy to make the human race feel miserable about itself and buy more stuff’.

ABC, CNN, MSNBC, Fox News and other outlets apparently filmed the Black Friday footage in June using actors from the AMC series The Walking Dead as well as CGI to increase the numbers.

Media analyst Bethany Stokes told Studio Exec EXCLUSIVELY:

If you look at the footage you will see the same faces as we saw in the last few episodes of The Walking Dead. Some of them still have the zombie make up on. We know that this never actually happened because no one has actually met anyone who was involved. The only examples of this happening have been copycats, who saw the footage and believed that they needed to behave in this way as well. This is learned behavior. And then the media will film that footage as well and interweave the two.

But to what purpose? Why would these media outlets do such a thing?

People are generally happy. They realise they are lucky to be alive and to be relatively wealthy. Most people have everything they need. So the media needs to persuade people to go out and shop but not just shop; shop as if it is a part of The Hunger Games. When buying a television becomes imbued with survivalist fervor just because you save some dollars you might be more inclined to do so, even though you ahve a perfectly good television that you only bought last year at home. Plus people who are not going to be moved to copy the behavior – liberals, moralists and the like -will become so depressed they will rush out and buy Ken Loach DVDs and Noam Chomsky books to cheer themselves up. Either way the cash register is working overtime.

ABC, CNN, MSNBC and Fox News were unavailable for comment.   

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