bill o'reilly

HOLLYWOOD – Bill O’Reilly has revealed that he is to produce a new movie called 12 Years a Well Fed Slave as an attempt to ‘counteract pervasive lies about slavery being bad’.

Fox News presenter Bill O’Reilly is to move into movie production with his new film 12 Years a Well Fed Slave, which will tell the story of how Solomon Jefferies, a slave. Bought by the Daniels family in Georgia, Jefferies was treated fine, with great food, comfy accommodation and the occasional ‘educational’ beating. Bill O’Reilly spoke to the Studio Exec EXCLUSIVELY about the project:12-years-a-slave-trailer-620x341

What I resent is a lot of well-meaning bleeding heart liberals talking about history when they know nothing at all about the actual facts. We all know the image of the suffering slave portrayed in Roots and 12 Years a Slave, but what about the vast majority of slaves who had life good and honky-dory, if that isn’t a racist word now.

I don’t think so.

Michelle Obama was right to say that slaves built the White House, but what she failed to point out was that these slaves got to eat venison on Sundays, were given free tickets to see the Mozart concert, when Mozart was playing in town and played badminton on their purpose built badminton courts. Yes, they were occasionally killed and tortured with impunity, yes, they were absolutely unfree and had no civil liberties, but that’s a small price to pay for Marriage of Figaro and hitting shuttlecocks now and then. I think you’ll agree.

12 Years a Well-Fed Slave will be released in… actually it won’t be released.

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